Gatorade should run some kind of charity promotion where they raise funds to help preserve endangered species of alligator.

Gator-aid.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Funkbuster_G
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2021
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I named my spotify playlist β€œfruit preserves”

cuz its a jam

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Comsicwastaken
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2021
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I like to advertise my homemade fruit preserves at clubs.

Whenever a song comes on, I’ll hold up a jar and say, β€œThis is my jam!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
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We preserve objects very well these days.

Soon, artefacts may just become a thing of the past.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Artifcial_autism
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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Did you hear about the musician making a song about preserves?

He says it's his currant jam.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ObjectionPW
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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You know, not everyone can preserve perishable goods inside metallic containers

But I can!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thattransgal
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
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I don’t understand people who preserve four leaf clovers...

They’re really pressing their luck.

Edit: Thank you very much for the unexpected medal!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2019
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I got fruit preserves on my finger.

Doctor said it was jammed

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FeedbackUSA
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
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I sometimes gets startled when I make preserves

Its jarring

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thesaurususaurus
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2019
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What did the bachelorette say to the DJ who was trying to steal her strawberry preserves?

"This is my jam!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SomaYoga
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
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TIL that Cards Against Humanity joked that they could buy an island with the money they donate to charity, so they bought an island in Maine to preserve wildlife. They named it β€˜Hawaii 2’ because β€œit’s on the Maine land.” connecticut.cbslocal.com/…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Big_Spicy_Tuna69
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2018
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How do you preserve a baby sheep?

With laminate.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lost_if_found
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2019
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Did you hear the new song created using only jars of preserves?

It's a slow jam.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Infinite_one
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
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Raspberry preserves

That's my jam.

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πŸ“…︎ May 03 2019
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In the middle of the battle, I decided to use a knife to preserve my ammo…

All the other paintball players started freaking out though…

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2019
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90s Eurodance group Technotronic recently bought a factory that manufactures all types of fruit preserves

However, there was an issue with getting the preserves into the packaging phase as the manufacturing plant was downstairs and the bottling machinery was upstairs.

After carefully reviewing the process, the group settled on a solution.

They decided to Pump Up The Jam.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AlduinIsAGeordie
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2018
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My wife asked me to remove the lid from a jar of preserves. I tried but...

It was jammed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigfoot13442
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2017
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What do you use to preserve a dead animal you don't really care about?

Casualdehyde

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ask-a-physicist
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2015
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I think it would be awesome to own a store where I sold home made jellies, jams, and preserves.

Someone would ask me for a recommendation. Then I'd grab a jar from a shelf and say "This one right here is my jam."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spunkychickpea
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2018
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What do you call a store that sells fruit preserves?

A jellycatessen

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Master_of_Few
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2014
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I'm going to crush and preserve some strawberries with the Red Hot Chili Peppers later on today...

We're having a jam session.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeardFM
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29 2016
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How do you preserve a sheep.....?

....you lamb-inate it....

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ultra-saurus
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2014
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