None of them, they can’t cook.
I’m a fraction hero.
Here is an image of my Grandfather's QuarterPounder. He made it probably 20 years ago - the quarter is from 1994. Grandpa said that he saw something that looked like this in a novelty shop somewhere and decided to improve the design a bit.
https://imgur.com/a/86LSZ
Quarter pounder.
Then I gave him a mallet and a quarter, and said here’s a quarter pounder
and noticed they were setting out the turkeys for thanksgiving. I decided to go ahead and buy mine for this year so I started digging around for the largest one they had looking for a good 20+ pounder but couldn’t find anything over 17 lbs. I turned to the stock boy and asked,
“Do these get any bigger?”
He answered with
“Well seein as they’re dead I reckon they’ve stopped groin.”
I went through a McDonald's drive-thru and ordered a quarter-pounder meal. The cashier wanted to confirm my order:
Her: Did you have the quarter meal?
Me: No, I wanted the whole thing.
I wanted to make my Dad a chainsaw for Christmas, but I'm not sure if we have the saw and I don't want to ruin a perfectly good chain for it.
Can anyone think of another dad joke gift, like a quarter pounder with cheese?
EDIT: I did the quarter-pounder with cheese. I used little rubber bands, (The kind kids make bracelets from) popsicle sticks and a rolled-up piece of sturdy paper. If anybody wants to make it, let me know and I'll go into more detail.
Me: You know they have a Cajun quarter pounder now?
Dad: I don't know if I'd like it, maybe on occajun.
So just now my Dad was looking through the local takeaway menu because I was heading over the shops and he wanted something to eat, so he finally decides that he wants a burger, hands me a £5 note and says "It'll be about 3 pounds" to which I responded "That's a lot of food, you sure you don't want a quarter-pounder instead?"
Unfortunately I was the only one chuckling to myself.
