What happens when Po from kung fu panda acts like a jerk?

He becomes a skadouchebag

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Phail64endo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2020
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Po Poe, acrylic,me,2019
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yoodadude
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
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What would you find on a po’manfoot?

A portmanteau

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 18 2019
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Cotton eye Po
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Buddsbunny
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2019
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Edgar Allan Po' Boy
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πŸ‘€︎ u/drummerchuk77
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2015
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My mom, in reference to my grandfather's POS computer, while holding a spindle of blank CDs, "Does it burn?"

"If I use enough gasoline it will."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FX114
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2015
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I'm just a po boy from a po family imgur.com/giAVaT4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kennyminot
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2013
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Wife: I wish I could poop

Me: Well shit

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrJDuffy
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
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Why did Karen press ctrl+alt+delete?

She wanted to talk to the task manager.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MelletjeN
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2020
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Is a crappy cash register...

...a POS?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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What do you call a PokΓ©mon with a speech impediment?

A Heliolisp

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bean_boi_2400
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2020
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cthree
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDawidosDawson
πŸ“…︎ Sep 05 2019
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What's a Panda's Favorite Form of Literature?

Po-ems

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πŸ‘€︎ u/John_isnt_my_name
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2020
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Which country is famous for its pandas ?

Po-land

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πŸ‘€︎ u/yashrajt
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2020
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What kind of toes do Hobbits have?

Po - Ta - Toes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NotSamsquanch
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2020
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the chicken dance is seductive and sexy...

it is... po-ultry in motion

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πŸ‘€︎ u/berninicaco3
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2019
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My dad's friend is a cop...

The cop told my dad to take a nap, my dad said "No" and the cop told him that he was "resisting a rest".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/loona_lovebad
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2015
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What happens when your hair is invaded?

the Po-lice come

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EpicSmashMan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2018
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Learn Chinese in 5 min

LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTES (You MUST read them out loud or it doesnt make as much sense)...

  1. Thats not right........ Sum Ting Wong
  2. Are you harboring a fugitive................... Hu Yu Hai Ding
  3. See me ASAP............. Kum Hia Nao
  4. Stupid Man...................... Dum Fuk
  5. Small horse... Tai Ni Po Ni
  6. Did you go to the beach?... Wai Yu So Tan
  7. I bumped in to a coffee table... Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni
  8. I think you need a face lift... Chin Tu Fat
  9. It's very dark in here... Wao So Dim
  10. I thought you were on a diet... Wai Yu Mun Ching
  11. This is a tow away zone... No Pah King
  12. staying out of sight... Lei Ying Lo
  13. He's cleaning his automobile... Wa Shing Ka
  14. Your body odor is offensive... Yu Stin Ki Pu
  15. Great... Fa Kin Su Pah
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πŸ‘€︎ u/edg0023
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2018
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How can you tell if Lady Gaga is dead?

You gotta poke her face. Po-po-po-pokerface.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/_izelle
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2018
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Not a dad, but I think I am prepared... Well everyone in line thought so anyway.

This starts and ends at the local coffee shop I go to on the way to work. My cashier takes my order; sausage, egg & cheese with salt, pepper, ketchup and hot sauce, on toasted rye. She taps away for a moment on the iPad POS then looks up and says "and a name for the sandwich?" to which I quickly raise my chest and proclaim "Breakfast!". To this all 6 people in the shop, including the cashier started chuckling.

[drop mic]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fractalphony
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2015
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My dad went to get a vasectomy...

My mom just told me the story. Apparently, my dad and my uncle went to get vasectomies together. They were picked up at the house by a limo. My mom, confused, asked why they ordered a limo to drive them to get their vasectomies, to which my dad responded, "If I'm going to be impotent, I want to look im-po'-tant."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fat_FAT_dick
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2014
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I know this guy right?

I know this guy right? He went and filled up his tank with fuel at the servo. He didn't put the hose in properly so it click and the 91 fuel splashed back onto him. He didn't think anything of it and just let it dry and went and paid for it. He's a smoker and on the way home from the servo he lights one up and his arm catches on fire. Fuck man, he was freaking out! So he puts his arm out the window to put the fire out. Next thing you know, the po po pull out behind this bloke, lights and sirens blaring! He got pull over and was arrested for an unregistered fire arm

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tarnawysks
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2017
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Got an email from Dad. Apparently Macs now support windows

http://i.imgur.com/3foPoUt.gif

I admit I laughed

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SammyGreen
πŸ“…︎ Dec 08 2013
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A customer dropped this one on me today

I was working the register (took a pity shift in the front end department) when I ran out of pennies. I paged my boss to come over and get me change.

Boss: Look, you have a penny on your POS, and I have one in my pocket here.

Me: That may not last very long, can I still get change?

Customer: C'mon man, cut the guy a break. He's just putting in his 2 cents on the situation.

His daughter groaned.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FrailRain
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2013
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Got my coworker the other day

I asked if he could help me with some POs for items being returned to vendors.

He asked me to "hang on"

I immediately grabbed the door handle and the side of the door I was next too and said "like this?"

He rolled his eyes but I felt somewhat proud

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Something_Syck
πŸ“…︎ Jan 26 2015
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A friend of mine posted this picture of her toddler with the caption, "Looks like we're having Filet Minion for dinner."
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElGuaco
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2015
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A Dad joke that my 8 year old daughter made up.

Q: Who protects you from bad guys and doesn't work very hard?

A: Po-least-men!

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2015
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What do you call a French fry with no money?

a po' tato

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nd2819
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2016
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My Daughter's Dad Joke

My daughter (who's 8) is already working on her Dad jokes. Just got this text:

> Dada! In Star Wars C3-PO was caught red handed! > > C3PO's hand was red! > > Anddddd I bet that he was caught by the empire red handed and got his red hand!

Never been prouder.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Psifertex
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2016
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Still giggling over this one.

I was on the john, and my wife was making me tea, and asked me if I wanted it on the throne, so I responded "No thanks, I don't want any po-TEA." Cue groans.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crepusculi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2015
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