Money puns

I need a money pun for a title of a speech I’m giving about the history of money. I knew you guys would spark my creativity.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Rfbaylon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 09 2018
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Money Puns are Pun-ey
πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/logicaleman
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 08 2018
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I know a family of Artists but I am not sure how they make so much Money

Very Sketchy People

πŸ‘οΈŽ 429
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/omarsrstt
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 16 2021
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If money can't buy love...

....then why do dating sites charge?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 03 2021
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I tried to make money as a sculptor,

but I could only get the heads right so I went bust.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Shu-di
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 07 2021
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Instead of a swear jar I have a negativity jar. Everytime I have a pessimistic thought I put a dollar in it.

It's half empty.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/electricianmagician
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 03 2021
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There’s some money down the drain
πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Charltskisaurus
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 18 2021
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Where does Frosty keep his money?

In the snow bank.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JEMstone85
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 04 2021
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A friend of mine makes good money selling camel’s milk, but he has to put up with surly camels all day.

It’s a drama dairy.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/WCBrann
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2021
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My Grandpa always said "don't watch your money, watch your health."

Then one day when I was watching my health, he stole my wallet.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kdlaz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 21 2021
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I saw a banker burying money under the bushes in his garden

It was his hedge fund

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Justlikeyourmoma
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 04 2021
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I've decided to invest all my money in soup stocks

I want to be a bouillonaire.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 382
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/2ndbreakfastfan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 02 2020
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I can't abide lending money, just the sight of an IOU note makes me furious.

I have Irritable Vowel Syndrome.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MafiaCub
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 25 2021
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I saved a bunch of money on my car insurance

When I fled the scene of the accident.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kdlaz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 17 2021
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What last name belongs to a man who is annoying and inherited a lot of money?

Richardson.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Zapps2000x
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 27 2021
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Where do fish get their money?

From a river bank

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dynarush_3
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 14 2021
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If you want to make easy money, just take pictures of salmon dressed in human clothes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 29 2021
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You know I always wanted to open my own sandwich shop. I would have all the meat and bread money could buy...

Problem was I was afraid something would go a rye

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/B-Man54
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 23 2021
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Why is money called dough?

Because we all knead it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jigsatics
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 04 2021
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Where does a pool table keep its money?

In its pockets

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/maccer20
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 11 2021
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What do you call an actor with money problems?

Johnny Debt

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/IStoleHisTeapot
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 02 2021
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I make money by selling simple sandwiches

It's my bread and butter

πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MrZxAlan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 06 2021
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What do you call the money your garbage business earns?

Gross revenue

πŸ‘οΈŽ 33
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Iamafillintheblank
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2021
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How did the Nazis get their money?

Krautfunding

πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Aereau
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 14 2020
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My high school bully still takes my lunch money.

But on the upside, he makes great Subway sandwiches!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 298
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/the_houser
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 13 2020
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I gave some dude the money I'd saved to to buy bushes to line my property. I'd introduce you, but

my hedge fund manager hates reddit.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/zensunni82
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 03 2021
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The last thing my grandfather said before he died was, β€œIt’s worth it to spend money on good speakers.”

That was some sound advice.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/LordCinko
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2021
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So I wanted to withdraw some money.

Have to try again later because for some reason I canβ€˜t ATM.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PEKKACHUNREAL
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 16 2020
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Kid: Why do you stand on one leg while you get money out of the ATM?

Dad: I’m checking my balance.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 35
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/daviscojokes
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 23 2021
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Your undergraduate diploma was a complete waste of money, you should throw it in the fire.

That's a first degree burn.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 28 2021
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Why did people loose so much money in derivative products and markets.

Because they had no option.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/saswata1194
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 07 2021
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What do you call someone from Florida with lots of teeth who likes to spend money on the stock market?

Investigator

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/beekeeper-of-secrets
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 14 2021
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Please just take my money you deserve it
πŸ‘οΈŽ 5k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jackson24me
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 05 2020
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Where did the nut keep his money?

In his cash shoe.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jollyflyingcactus
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2021
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What do you call a person who thinks he or she has not earned enough money?

Income-plete.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 14 2021
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**Genie: I will grant you 2 wishes** **Me: I want to be rich.** **Genie: Okay granted, second wish?** **Rich: I'd like loads of money.**

Taken from fb

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/XDG-Diggz74
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 03 2021
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What do you call a vegetable that makes money?

Corn on the job

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/-umop-apisdn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2021
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I always put my money in drums

Because it’s a sound investment.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cananbaum
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 06 2021
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I got my chips before I put my money into the vending machine

I guess it's out of order.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/realtonylong
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 30 2020
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A preacher with a lisp hired a sinner to paint his church. To save money, the sinner man added water into the paint can. It didn’t work well. The preacher told him:

Young man, you need to repaint and thin no more.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cerebolic-parabellum
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 10 2021
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Just spent $300 on hiring a limousine and discovered the fee doesn't include a driver.

Can't believe I've spent all that money and have nothing to chauffer it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 29 2021
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The genie asked, "What’s your first wish?" Steve replied, "I wish I was rich!" The genie nodded and said, "What’s your second wish?"

Rich exclaimed, "I want lots of money!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 22 2020
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Guys, I think my friend is addicted to spending money on female Twitch streamers

He's showing dangerous simptoms

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Nitefury07
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 04 2021
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I took some money off the wall…

Now I hear my roommate saying, "Where's wall dough?"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 02 2021
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My friend is making a lot of easy money by taking pictures of salmon dressed in human clothes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 21 2020
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The last thing my grandfather told me was β€œIt’s worth spending money on good speakers.”

That was some sound advice.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 06 2020
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The last thing my grandfather told me was β€œIt is worth spending money on good speakers.”

That was...sound advice.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 19 2020
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