A 50 Cent concert featuring Nickelback.
Happy No L!
Because they're all not 'C's.
Nell, Edna, Leon, Nedra, Anita, Rolf, Nora, Alice, Carol, Leo, Jane, Reed, Dena, Dale, Basil, Rae, Penny, Lana, Dave, Denny, Lena, Ida, Bernadette, Ben, Ray, Lila, Nina, Jo, Ira, Mara, Sara, Mario, Jan, Ina, Lily, Arne, Bette, Dan, Reba, Diane, Lynn, Ed, Eva, Dana, Lynne, Pearl, Isabel, Ada, Ned, Dee, Rena, Joel, Lora, Cecil, Aaron, Flora, Tina, Arden, Noel, and Ellen.
He should have a good vowel movement. His next diaper change could spell disaster though.
I told him they were the letters of recommendation.
ANNforgivable, ANNother One, bANNed, ANNdroid, ANNticlimactic, ANNbelievable, ANNemployment, ANNcharted, ANNgry, ANNlucky, ANNseen, ANNalyze, ANNadvised, ANNafraid, ANNaided, ANNapologetic, United NatANNs, AmericANN, CanadiANN, IndiANN, JamaicANN, BritANN, JapANN, AsiANN, HumANN, ANNoying, DirectANN, ProductANN, DestructANN, RegeneratANN, AcceleratANN, AbsorptANN, AccommodatANN, AccumulatANN ActANN, additANN, SubscriptANN, SubtractANN, MultiplicatANN, DivisANN, EducatANN, AssumptANN, AppreciatANN, ANNything.
But there were so many stage lights turned towards me thatβ¦
I said, ooh, I'm blinded by the lights.
Wouldn't Wanna Beya's
..a duel meaning.
A giant list of puns
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.
I would avoid the sushi if I was you. Itβs a little fishy.
Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind itβs tearable.
Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!
I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.
What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.
How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.
I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.
Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.
I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.
My cat was just sick on the carpet, I donβt think itβs feline well.
Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.
How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.
What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.
Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.
Thereβs a new type of broom out, itβs sweeping the nation.
What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.
What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.
Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.
Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.
How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.
The shovel was a ground breaking invention.
A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."
A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."
Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.
What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.
I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.
What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.
I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.
Towels canβt tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.
Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"
Do you know sign language? You should learn it, itβs pretty handy.
What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.
Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.
What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.
A cross eyed teacher couldnβt control his pupils.
After the accident, the juggler didnβt have the balls to do it.
I used to be afraid of hu
... keep reading on reddit β‘sΗΚoΙΎpΙp/ΙΉ
I guess I suffer from premature ejokeulation
Son: Where are you in the photo?
Dad: That's me in the corner.
That's me in the corner...
EDIT. Sorry that was just a dream
While my kids like it, my wife says itβs just a power trip.
Now whatβs left is Yellow Pages
It's my Czech-list
-Because they have so many legs!
He musta had a vowel movement.
It was the list I could do
While inside, I took a deep breath and said, "Ahh, nice dairy air!"
The woman next to me strongly disagreed. She didn't have to smack me though ...
I guess Iβm just too square to try angle.
Doctor: Thank you. It is very organ-ized.
Got any tips you can share?
Man 1: With great power comes great electricity bill.
Man 2: Watt a powerful message
Full Kudos to the original post below
https://i.imgur.com/EAkxfPC.png
https://www.reddit.com/r/technicallythetruth/comments/o9ehn7/shockingly_true/
one hits me in the right place and I think, βtouchΓ©β.
It wasn't very long so my time there was brief.
Wouldn't that be a nico-ton?
I said, only if theyβre givinβ βem away, givinβ βem away, givinβ βem away now.
His name didn't ring any GΓΆ- bells.
A Peabody.
What's R Kelly's favorite key to sing in?
A. minor.
It was a bad Hobbit.
But I don't have any clean ones...
But lettuce romaine calm !!
I said: βIs that a fret?'
Itβs a cut above the rest.
It's just a ruff draught for now.
I donβt know Y (possible repost, but I donβt care)
Oops, wrong sub
I also told him "now you'll be able to put your nose up at someone and give them the cold shoulder at the same time"
He thought I was "very punny"
NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L, NO L...
That's me and the coroner.
