My grandfather just walked into the room with a guy wearing skinny jeans and eating avocado toast.

I said, β€œWho is this guy?”

My grandfather: That’s my hip replacement.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 03 2021
🚨︎ report
A jean-ius brain.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bewondered
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 30 2021
🚨︎ report
Blue jeans should be considered a condiment

Because every time I put them on, I look like a snack.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/benmwaballs
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 02 2021
🚨︎ report
Why are skinny jeans like a cheap hotel?

NO BALLROOM!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Victorian_Astronaut
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 05 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do you never see people running in Jeans alone?

Because Jeans run in a family

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Br4ve_He4rt
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 05 2021
🚨︎ report
What do designer jeans and cheap hotels have in common?

No ballroom .

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 01 2021
🚨︎ report
Jean-Pierre’s dream of meeting an Extra-Terrestrial finally came true. His first question for the alien was...

You must be from Mars, eh?

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/granquist04
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 24 2021
🚨︎ report
I accidentally left some money in my jeans as they went through the wash.

I just worry because I know it’s illegal to launder money.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Like8catsbro
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I was in a bar in Texas, when a man walks in wearing a paper cowboy hat, a paper shirt, paper jeans,paper chaps and paper boots.

Anyway, the sheriff burst in and arrested him for rustling.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2020
🚨︎ report
"The Epic Split" featuring Jean Claude Van Damme
πŸ‘οΈŽ 39
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/michael_v92
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 07 2020
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Jean Pool
πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hound_O_Ulster
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I heard about a politician who was caught accepting bribes from a jean company.

He’s in the pocket of big pants.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/King_Arthur24
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the guy in the dad jeans get a COVID test?

Because he didn't have any taste

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/frontsign_mike
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Jean-Claude VAN damm
πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/hapitwat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Wolverine walks in on Jean Grey sneezing without covering her mouth..

...and says, "Hygiene".

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/r1pen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 05 2020
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Apple bottom jeans boots with the purr
πŸ‘οΈŽ 71
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RajuNeupane
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 07 2020
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What is Jean Luc Picard's favorite shotgun?

TEN GUAGE

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Bill_Parker
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 23 2020
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As a chubby guy, I always avoid wearing skinny jeans.

I find it extremely difficult to pull it off.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 04 2020
🚨︎ report
what is the scientific word for a pair of jeans?

duodenum (duo denim)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jensyao
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 28 2020
🚨︎ report
My grandpa just came over to my house with a young guy wearing skinny jeans and eating avocado toast. Miffed, I questioned, β€œWho's this guy?” Gramps chuckled and replied, "Who, him?"

"This is my hip replacement!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 28 2020
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I lost my sweatpants, so I wore a pair of jeans to the gym.

It got ripped.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/languagepotato
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 24 2020
🚨︎ report
What if Jeans was actually pronounced like Jean. Like in Jean Paul Marat.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nanofatty22
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 31 2019
🚨︎ report
Skinny jeans aren't for everyone...

I personally don't think I could pull them off.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JadedByEntropy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 25 2019
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[To someone with ripped jeans] Did you go to church in those jeans?

Because they’re really holy

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/usereddit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 28 2019
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I just watched a documentary on the evolution of skinny jeans.

I couldn’t get into it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Police tried to arrest some jeans....

they just couldn’t get them cuffed.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Jaesquared
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 13 2019
🚨︎ report
Why does the skeleton wear skinny jeans?

Because it’s got a marrow waistline.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/boogerknows
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a pair of jeans and a brain?

Genius.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/mesir
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Dad joke pun the GF hit me with this morning regarding blue jeans

While putting on a pair of jeans this morning before work, I remarked to my gf something along the lines of "I've had these jeans for years, they're so old!"

To which she replied: "Yeah I can see that, they look like they've been in your family for generations."

I'm still absolutely floored with pride.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Je_Suis_NaTrolleon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 05 2019
🚨︎ report
What are Mario's favourite jeans to wear?

Denim Denim Denim

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/_Warghost_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I don't know where love for shoes comes from. Must run in my jeans. imgur.com/f1o9gLd
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GeezusManForReal
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 01 2018
🚨︎ report
My costume for Halloween this year is to wear nothing but a pair of jeans.

I'm dressing as Premature Ejaculation, because I just came in my pants.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 25
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/IAmButtAMan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 02 2018
🚨︎ report
i asked a girl wearing fur boots and Apple Bottom jeans for water

needless to say, shawty got l'eau

πŸ‘οΈŽ 105
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/gowthamcity
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 02 2016
🚨︎ report
Exercising in jeans, it just doesn’t work out
πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/AlrightRealNice
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the classic Greek Scholar say to the fat bloke trying on skinny jeans in his boutique?

Euripides, you pay!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/stevebox2345
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Skinny jeans are like a cheap hotel room....

No ballroom.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2021
🚨︎ report
I heard about a politician who was caught taking bribes from a jean company.

He’s in the pocket of big pants.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/King_Arthur24
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
what is the scientific word for a pair of jeans?

duodenum (duo denim)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jensyao
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 28 2020
🚨︎ report
This morning, grandpa walked into my room with a young bearded guy wearing skinny jeans. I asked, β€œWho is this guy?”

Grandpa: My hip replacement.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 1k
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 26 2018
🚨︎ report
What type of jeans does Mario wear

Denim Denim Denim

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FruitsNToots
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 17 2019
🚨︎ report
As a fat guy, I try to avoid wearing skinny jeans.

I find it very difficult to pull it off.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 10
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 01 2019
🚨︎ report
As a chubby person, I always avoid wearing skinny jeans.

I find it very difficult to pull them off.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What do skinny jeans and cheap hotels have in common?

No Ballroom!!!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
πŸ’¬οΈŽ
πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hammerlock01
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2019
🚨︎ report

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