IMS Puns

A list of puns related to "IMS"

Im left all a loan
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👤︎ u/DefNotInTheOven
📅︎ Dec 03 2020
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Just wanna say im a huge fan
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👤︎ u/HamadRajput
📅︎ Dec 07 2020
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Im quivering in my boots
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👤︎ u/bloodywolfeyes
📅︎ Nov 07 2020
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so anyway im switching my major to marketing...

just a few hours ago my brother was talking about buying cinnamon rolls from his english teacher who bakes and sells it on instagram as a side hustle and i said IF SHES AN ENGLISH TEACHER SHE SHOULD CALL THEM SYNONYM ROLLS and honestly im super proud

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👤︎ u/JacksonCM
📅︎ Dec 08 2020
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Im koaling a day
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👤︎ u/drakendorian
📅︎ Nov 27 2020
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Its 1:30 and im drunk, thought this was comical

What did the hispanic who took 2 too many drugs say? Help i think I over(dos)ed

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👤︎ u/gangaking69
📅︎ Oct 28 2020
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Some people say im some handsome guy

But without hands, im just some guy

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👤︎ u/bayernfan25
📅︎ Nov 16 2020
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im beautiful
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👤︎ u/PoopyMaster007
📅︎ Oct 09 2020
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My wife left me cause Im too insecure

Never mind she was just at the grocery store

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👤︎ u/bribonzuelo92
📅︎ Jun 01 2020
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My dad went to the store to buy milk, i said “sure, old man” and he said “im not good at comebacks”

I never saw him again

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👤︎ u/DogEatingSpaghetti
📅︎ Nov 20 2020
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Im not a dad, I just like dad jokes, but I think I will one day have children just for dad jokes

Because im really dadicated to the bit

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👤︎ u/OMGab8
📅︎ Dec 01 2020
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A bloke came up to me and said im going to attack you with the neck of my guitar.

I said to him is that a Fret!

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👤︎ u/tiger7971
📅︎ Oct 13 2020
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Im investing in baby elephants

They're gonna be big

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👤︎ u/BoredH2
📅︎ Oct 12 2020
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My job installed this new faucet. Im really faucinated by it
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👤︎ u/ATMiceli
📅︎ Sep 16 2020
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Im trying to make a joke about cartography

I just need someone to help map it out

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👤︎ u/HunterGrayBeard
📅︎ Nov 05 2020
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Theres 3.3 million people in here so I figured id go ahead and post that im looking for one night stand.

Matter of fact, make it 2. I need one for each lamp.

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👤︎ u/kriskidd21
📅︎ Oct 27 2020
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Im dead inside

I'm literally a skeleton moving with clothes

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👤︎ u/Migzzz831
📅︎ Oct 17 2020
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Im really at a cross roads here
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👤︎ u/ATMiceli
📅︎ Sep 13 2020
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Anti wax or smth, idk im not autistic
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👤︎ u/DawnofX
📅︎ Sep 25 2020
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So im about ten years old walking home from school with my mates..

When a chap in a van pulls up gets out and says there is a new leather sette and a leather chair in the van you can have it free of charge.

We decided to take it to our house. I told my dad expecting him to be pleased. Instead he came over and clipped my ear with the back of his hand.

Crying i said what was that for. My dad said How many times do i have to tell you. DONT TAKE SUITES OFF STRANGERS!

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👤︎ u/tiger7971
📅︎ Oct 01 2020
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Neutron to electron: i think im decaying into a proton

Electron: are you sure?

Neutron: im nearly positive

Electron: ive never been so attracted to you

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👤︎ u/ponylover9628
📅︎ Sep 16 2020
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I have nothing to say... But im sorry
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👤︎ u/alastair-tut
📅︎ Jul 29 2020
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Im near sighted and tone deaf

I can’t C sharp, but I am the dad of A minor, That boy is nothing but treble.

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👤︎ u/Zeffer90
📅︎ Jul 18 2020
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Im sorry if this post is unnerving
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👤︎ u/ATMiceli
📅︎ Jul 17 2020
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Im good friends with 25 letters of the alphabet.

I don't know Y.

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👤︎ u/The_Apefucker
📅︎ Jul 11 2020
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im sorry... so sorry

https://preview.redd.it/q5qwe293xq351.png?width=850&format=png&auto=webp&s=012dd15015339e123d09a939a70fc64b604e11d4

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👤︎ u/blipityblob
📅︎ Jun 08 2020
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I think im gonna need to buy some adderall for my camera

Because its having trouble focusing

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👤︎ u/Joshd175
📅︎ Jul 14 2020
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Im not addicted to brake fluid, I swear!

I can stop anytime!

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👤︎ u/potatogamer555
📅︎ Aug 20 2020
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Im going to start collecting highlighters

Mark my words!

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👤︎ u/Whlightning
📅︎ Jul 24 2020
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Im sofa king done
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👤︎ u/ATMiceli
📅︎ May 29 2020
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Son: Dad, im hungry!

Dad:"(hands his son a burger) It's a bison burger!"

Also dad:(leaves, and never comes back)

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👤︎ u/romben1
📅︎ Jun 19 2020
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am I right ? of course Im on the left wing :D
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👤︎ u/cihan_emre
📅︎ May 29 2020
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My mom told me to stop singing "Im a Believer" because it was annoying.

At first I though she was kidding...Then I saw her face

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👤︎ u/chiriboy
📅︎ May 30 2020
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My first username was Footloose. Then I changed it to Im_Alright, and now it's Danger_Zone

But enough about my Kenny Logins.

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👤︎ u/meester_beeggie
📅︎ Jun 09 2020
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Im dieing of laughter
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👤︎ u/ItzYaBoi25
📅︎ Feb 27 2019
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Im sorry i can't talk today. I have p!nk eye
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👤︎ u/SyringeWinge
📅︎ Apr 13 2020
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Im a master at sleeping

I can do it with my eyes closed!

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👤︎ u/APunchToThePuss
📅︎ Jun 08 2020
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Finally, I have something to snack on while im waiting for iCloud to backup!
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👤︎ u/TheBerg28
📅︎ Apr 23 2020
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Im gonna name my son 'the nail'

So i can say 'i hit the nail on the head'

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👤︎ u/vladturapov
📅︎ May 11 2020
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I'm bald and im going to get a head tattoo of multiple rabbits

So from a distance it looks like hares

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👤︎ u/BiscuitaBoyo
📅︎ Jan 03 2020
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