Turns ot the busts on the haunted mansion ride at Disneyland don't actually look at you. They're just carved into the wall.

So that's a releif.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FremanKynes
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2016
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I do ot have time for breakfast

I couldn't fit that N

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/blahsalot
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2017
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My friend started to get rowdy and throw around bread...

I had to read him the rye-ot act

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
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Men's Bathroom warning

If you don't aim well , urinal'ot of trouble

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2019
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What do you call an amphibian with a lot of questions?

An ask-a-lotl!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDesertSnowman
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2017
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A bunch of grains got together to protest.

It was a real rye-ot.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thelionmermaid
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2019
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What's an alcoholic's favorite book?

Tequila Mockingbird

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Divexz
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2015
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My pops and I watched the super bowl commercials together…

We skip most of the football due to the annoying announcers, confusing rules and frequent replay delays, but I was able to come up with an answer when he asked what happens when both teams fail to score in OT. It’s a tie, Dad.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/carltodw
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2018
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Whot!

This one requires a little backstory:

There's a cardgame called WHOT! It's just uno but with different shapes. Me and my dad used to play it a lot.

Unfortunately it's led to the same terrible joke being made repeatedly over the last 10 years or so. It goes something like this:

Dad: "You'll never guess what film's on tv tonight."

Me: "What?"

Dad: "No, I don't think they made a movie out of that. It's a card game."

It's literally been going on for over a decade now and it pains me deep inside my soul every time he says it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigontheinside
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2013
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Not my dad but I thought you guys would like this.

So I work in produce at whole foods. One of the guys I work with is an awesome older guy. Mid 40's. Anyway. Last night this happened. He comes up to me holding a beaten up looking pear and asks:

"If this pear was a bird what kind would it be"

"I don't know, what?"

"A pearot"

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Garenator
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2013
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