My friend David lost his ID,

Now we call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 49
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TechX5
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2021
🚨︎ report
Two women were sharing the same ID card

Sharon is Karen

πŸ‘︎ 13k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MomsSpoghetti
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend Sid has had his ID stolen...

He's now known as 'S'

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Theres 3.3 million people in here so I figured id go ahead and post that im looking for one night stand.

Matter of fact, make it 2. I need one for each lamp.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kriskidd21
πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my friend David's ID

So now he's just Dav

πŸ‘︎ 95
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bennyhana_911
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
🚨︎ report
My buddy David has his ID stolen

Now he’s just Dav

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MissouriFred
πŸ“…︎ Oct 20 2020
🚨︎ report
I once saw two men quarreling because both claimed that his family name is Fuck and the other is lying. After seeing their IDs, I found out that only one man was telling the truth, the one with the first name What.

What, the actual Fuck.

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sodrohu
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Just heard a grocery store manager telling off a young guy on the checkout. β€œWhy’d you ask that woman with kids for ID? What was she buying?”

β€œCardamom”

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Aphex-Puddle
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the prospector get a fake id?

The bar doesn't serve minors.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clark_creationz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Whoever stole my Microsoft office account ID, I will find you.

You have my Word.

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Willow-wolliW
πŸ“…︎ Jun 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A chord walked into a bar with a fake ID

Bartender said β€œNice try, but you’re just A minor.”

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/oaudo
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID...

Now he is no longer instinctual, with only his super-ego left. Is this a psycho-babble joke? Yes, I'm a-Freud so.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
🚨︎ report
So if I set up touch ID on my phone for the same finger on both hands

Does it make it ambitextrous?

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aesterian
πŸ“…︎ Jan 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Looks like thay have COLLAR ID
πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/trishmckinley602
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Reading maps is such a pain in the ass, but id be lost with out it
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/averagepenisman
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Phone rings.......Dad: What does the Caller ID say?......Son: It says Private Caller......

Dad: Don't answer it. We only pick up for ranks Lieutenant Caller and higher.

πŸ‘︎ 229
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πŸ‘€︎ u/2donutkid2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Kid looks at moms ID Card

Sex: F

Kid starts laughing, mom asks what happened?

Kid says: were you really so bad at sex you got and F?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UkuSw0w
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Whenever I'm feeling down, I read my blood donor ID

It says B positive

πŸ‘︎ 40
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jimingot_yesjams
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2019
🚨︎ report
Someone stole my IDs.

That iot!

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Lum1nar
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2018
🚨︎ report
Thought id beat him to post it here
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crazypyros
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID during a trip.

Now we all call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ChekovsCurlyHair
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
My mate David had his ID stolen...

... I now call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/gbuckingham89
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07 2020
🚨︎ report
My buddy David had his ID stolen.

I now call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 81
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID.

Now he’s just Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ObiWanToasty
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend David had his ID stolen.

Now we just call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID...

Now he’s just Dav

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his id.

We now call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/johnreese421
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that David lost his ID in prague?

Now we just have to call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 94
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πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2019
🚨︎ report
My uncle David just lost his wallet and phone and ID.

He’s just Dav now

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/qmechan
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that David lost his ID in prague?

Now we just have to call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
🚨︎ report
My mate David has his ID stolen

Now we call him Dav

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pig-gy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID...

Now I call him Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 73
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/VerboseLeader
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David had is ID stolen

Now he’s just Dav

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David had his ID stolen

Now he's just Dave

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/stevenplaysmcpeyt
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
David lost his ID...

He’s Dav now.

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SillyKnights
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID...

Now he's just Dav

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jennifer_stinger
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David just lost his ID.

Now he's just Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/norrisrw
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Your uncle David just lost his ID

Now you can call him uncle Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 91
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nevarc_Xela
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2019
🚨︎ report
"Hi my name is David and i lost my ID...

... I guess you can call me Dav now."

πŸ‘︎ 44
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/yalam_boi
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you head that David got his ID stolen ?

We have to call him Dav now .

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Messicanhero
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2019
🚨︎ report
My name is David, and I just lost my ID somewhere.

So now I'm just Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pluckish
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID

Now he's just Dav.

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DrewciferCDXX
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about my friend David who lost his ID?

We had to call him Dav

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AMcBroom81
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID

He's just Dave now

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HelpMeFindTheGay
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend David lost his ID

Now we just call him Dav

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jester1525
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2018
🚨︎ report

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