48 Hilarious Hee Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

Hee hee

👍︎ 42

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👤︎ u/levzeppelin

📅︎ Nov 16 2020

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Tee hee

👍︎ 4k

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👤︎ u/pinkpunther96

📅︎ Jan 30 2020

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hee hee

👍︎ 44

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👤︎ u/zynpctn34

📅︎ Dec 14 2019

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Ree Hee Hee Hee Hee Hee

👍︎ 36

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👤︎ u/iknowthisischeesy

📅︎ Dec 12 2019

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Did you hear about Maya Hee?

Maya who?
Maya Haha....
groan!!

👍︎ 22

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👤︎ u/chanderjeet

📅︎ Oct 23 2019

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Hee hee

👍︎ 74

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👤︎ u/retartedplayer

📅︎ Apr 20 2019

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Why are donkies always hee-hawing?

They're a little hoarse

👍︎ 8

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👤︎ u/mr---jones

📅︎ Jan 14 2019

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My therapist says that I second guess every decision that I ever make.

[deleted]

👍︎ 11k

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👤︎ u/OMMOPOWER

📅︎ Mar 24 2021

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How do farmers party?

They turnip the beets!

👍︎ 51

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👤︎ u/Just_Bee_Pawsitive

📅︎ Mar 18 2021

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TIFU by mixing up my coworkers' sandwich orders and not giving them what they requested.

Sorry, wrong sub.

👍︎ 19k

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👤︎ u/dinner_cat96

📅︎ Jul 08 2020

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Did you know that Jedi master Yoda was actually a Austro-Bavarian folk singer?

It's true. Right there in his last name, "Lay Hee Hoo."

👍︎ 9

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👤︎ u/jfshay

📅︎ Mar 25 2021

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What hospital ward is john cena afraid of?

ICU

👍︎ 46

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👤︎ u/McCarty_Bedell

📅︎ Nov 07 2020

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Do you know what Bruce Lee's vegetarian brother is called?

Brocco Lee

I'll see myself out.

👍︎ 10k

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👤︎ u/StefanodesLocomotivo

📅︎ Dec 27 2019

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An open letter to the mods of r/dadjokes:

C

👍︎ 5k

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👤︎ u/DrunkRedditBot

📅︎ Jan 08 2020

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My wife says I'm the cheapest man in the world.

I'm not buying it.

👍︎ 8k

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👤︎ u/2040009

📅︎ Jan 15 2020

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Michael Jackson's favorite tank

"Hey Michael Jackson, what's your favorite Japanese tank of World War II?"

"The Chi-HE-HEE!"

👍︎ 3

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👤︎ u/jesusofbullets

📅︎ Feb 22 2021

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Why did the Donkey quit his job?

Hee Hawed enough!

👍︎ 25

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👤︎ u/90eight

📅︎ Nov 19 2020

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Did you know you start out with four kidneys, but lose two of them growing up?

They turn into adult knees.

Be easy guys this is my first semi original dad joke.

👍︎ 2k

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👤︎ u/ShadowKroXIII

📅︎ Nov 29 2019

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Just in case

👍︎ 4k

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👤︎ u/Marekmonster

📅︎ Jul 27 2019

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What would Michael Jackson’s pronouns be?

He/Hee

👍︎ 23

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👤︎ u/thedudenamedjay

📅︎ Nov 15 2020

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How do the French send photos of cats to each other?

They use Snapchat

👍︎ 22

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👤︎ u/DubcekD

📅︎ May 15 2020

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3 unwritten rules of life...

👍︎ 16k

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👤︎ u/madazzahatter

📅︎ Jul 01 2018

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What was Michael Jackson’s favorite treat?

Little Deb Hee! Hee!

👍︎ 8

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👤︎ u/pippingigi

📅︎ Nov 21 2020

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I hope this joke doesn't fall flat

👍︎ 189

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👤︎ u/SleepyWordsmith

📅︎ Sep 10 2019

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I sexually identify as Michael Jackson

My personal pronouns are He/Hee

👍︎ 51

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👤︎ u/yoitsdavid

📅︎ Jul 10 2020

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What did the doctor say to his patient that wanted to do his own stitches?

Suture self.

👍︎ 280

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👤︎ u/SatanStoleMyPanties

📅︎ Jun 13 2019

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If you ain't punny, you can't be my honey.

👍︎ 1k

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👤︎ u/FabioInMyBed

📅︎ Aug 24 2017

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There was a man that wasn't allowed to fart.

Since he started dating, his girlfriend would chastise him to great lengths everytime he felt the need to fart.

After they got married, the situation was maintained. He couldn't possibly fart near his wife. Sometimes he had to leave the house, just to pass some gas.

When he was really old, he died peacefully during in his sleep while lying on his back. She called the undertaker, so the arrangements for the funeral could be made.

When the undertaker rolled the man of the bed, there was a massive fart. The undertaker looked to the now widow to see how she was going to react, but she simply said:

"No need to chastise him anymore. Hee can RIP in Peace!"

👍︎ 8

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👤︎ u/DangerASA

📅︎ Aug 24 2020

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My family and I got wonton soup but we needed one more,

so now we have twoton soup.

👍︎ 7

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👤︎ u/s1ncha

📅︎ Jan 14 2020

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What snack cake brand does Michael Jackson eat?

Little Deb-hee hee.

👍︎ 5

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👤︎ u/RSGaming0416

📅︎ Aug 20 2020

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My dad broke his wrist

So my dad broke his wrist the other day. He asked the doctor, if he could play the piano after the healing process. The doctor said: Yeah, sure. My dad: Great, couldn't do that before.

Translated from German. Hope you still enjoy it ;)

👍︎ 2k

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👤︎ u/chregi91

📅︎ Mar 20 2017

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If a child refuses to sleep during nap time

Are they guilty of resisting a rest?

👍︎ 27

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👤︎ u/Moxoria

📅︎ Jul 11 2019

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No one:

0, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9

👍︎ 68

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👤︎ u/SudoUsername

📅︎ May 31 2019

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Luke had a sister and a trainer toooo...

Leia, Yoda, Leia, Yoda, Leia HEE HOOOOO

👍︎ 2

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👤︎ u/KairuSmairukon

📅︎ Jun 22 2020

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My Spanish friend just said "El Mundo".

This means the world to me!

👍︎ 6

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👤︎ u/TehIrishSoap

📅︎ Jul 24 2019

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What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite type of butter

Ghee-hee

👍︎ 4

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👤︎ u/Strider1001

📅︎ May 29 2020

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So I heard Michael Jackson was accused of child abuse

I guess you could say those kids where hit by a smooth criminal.

👍︎ 5

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👤︎ u/BigBoyMuguff

📅︎ Mar 17 2019

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Two cats are having a swimming race.

One is called ‘one two three’ and the other is ‘in deux trois’. Which Cat won the race?

‘One two three’ because the ‘un deux trois’ cat sank.

👍︎ 17

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👤︎ u/BigManEB

📅︎ Oct 11 2018

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How do you contact Michael Jackson?

Send him a hee-hee mail

👍︎ 4

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👤︎ u/mddc52

📅︎ Aug 18 2019

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I found what I suspect is a long-running dad joke in a drawer at my work. It's a quarter pounder. imgur.com/go2fngq

👍︎ 2k

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👤︎ u/natron5000_

📅︎ Sep 03 2013

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What did the Spanish farmer tell his dad before moving to the city?

Ciudad.

👍︎ 762

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👤︎ u/Ratshot

📅︎ Jul 26 2015

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Why did Michael Jackson buy a thrift store?

Billy jeans hee hee

👍︎ 3

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👤︎ u/Alexasha05

📅︎ Dec 27 2019

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What happens to cowboys when they get food poisoning?

They get dire yee-haw.

Source: I have food poisoning and am dying. The dehydration has led my mind to some cowboy related place I guess. Also dire hee-haw works better but I don't know anything about what cowboys say.

👍︎ 6

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👤︎ u/Lightxspeed

📅︎ Dec 27 2019

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Told my neighbor, jenny, she was hooking up with the wrong guy... he's a jackass...

She laughed, "hee haw!" The farmer said, "she can't understand ya... she's a donkey!"

👍︎ 11

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline

📅︎ Nov 27 2019

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I sexually identify as Michael Jackson

My preferred pronouns are He/Hee

👍︎ 74

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👤︎ u/Anonymous-Ballon

📅︎ Feb 28 2020

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Why did the Donkey quit his job?

Hee Hawed enough!

👍︎ 7

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👤︎ u/Fromhell187

📅︎ Apr 23 2020

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Knock knock

Who's there?

Maya

Maya who

Maya hee hee 🎶🎵

👍︎ 13

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👤︎ u/dude_above_me_is_gay

📅︎ Dec 12 2019

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What is Yoda’s last name?

Lay hee hoo

👍︎ 39

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👤︎ u/herb_o_geno

📅︎ Oct 10 2019

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