Heat sink Puns

So his son plays baseball and his mitt was in rough condition. They make these little boxes for baseball mitts that put out heat, humidity, and massage the mitt slightly to keep it in good condition. They're pretty small and can fit on a kitchen counter top. It's best to keep them near the sink to refill the water reservoir when it gets low. It's helpful if it's like right above the sink. My friend had put his on the bar behind the sink.

It was seriously the nicest bar mitt spa I had ever seen!

Dad: So I heard that two guys drowned in [random town] this morning...

Me: That's horrible! What happened?

Dad: Apparently, they were in a kayak and they lit a fire which caused it to sink.

Me: ...that doesn't sound like a good idea...

Dad: Yea well, it just goes to show you can't have your kayak and heat it too....

Two Inuits are out fishing on a kayak. They've been out all day, and the sun's setting. As the temperature drops, they decide to light a campfire on the watercraft, which, unsurprisingly sinks. This just goes to prove that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.

My uncle told us this one today...

Two eskimos are in a kayak, paddling along a river. Freezing cold, one eskimo says to the other, "hey, why don't we start a fire here in the middle of the kayak?" so they manage to get a small fire going and start to finally warm up, when the fire creates a hole in the middle of the kayak. The kayak fills with water and they sink to the bottom of the river. Moral of the story? You can't have your kayak and heat it, too.

My dad had a hearty laugh at this one.