I have a friend who teaches Germanic languages.
I asked him if he likes those dots that go over certain vowels.
He replied, "Umm, lots!"
Are German puns allowed??
I often worry about German sausages
Basically I fear the wurst.
Edit: thanks for my first award ya loonies ;)
Oh man, German sausages...
Why did I stop eating German sausages?
Some bastard has taken my festive German fruit bread
How do German bread makers greet each other at the beginning of the day?
They say "Gluten Morgen!"
What's the German WW2 pilot's favourite dessert?
My German cake has gone missing
How does two German car enthusiast cowboys greet each other?
A German tourist jumped off to the freezing water to save my precious dog who was drowning.
After he climbed out he said, "Here is ze dog, dry him off and he vill be fine."
I said, "Are you a vet?"
To which he replied, annoyed; "Vet? I'm fucking zoaking."
A German guy walks into a bar and asks for a Martini. The barman asks "dry"?
The guy says "no, just the one"
It’s funny cause it’s true.
I tried making an old family recipe of german sausage boiled in vodka.
It was the Absolut wurst.
When you're at the urinals, it doesn't matter of you're French, German, Spanish or Swedish
My wife keeps yelling at me for only eating German sausages
I mean, what is the wurst that can happen?
My German friend Hans got so drunk on American light beer we had to carry him to the truck to go home...
How do you say hello to a gluten-free German?
I really hate German sausage.
Why do you get German people's attention when sneezing?
Nein du verdammter Nebel!
Have you heard of the Christmas game that Germans play?
What do you call a German racing movie?
A German Family consisting of a Mom, Dad, 8-year-old son, and 6-year-old daughter walk into a bar.
The Bartender says, "Sorry, we don't serve your kind here."
What did the German man say when asked if he could count past 8?
Due to COVID-19, the German government is advising that people stock up on sausages and cheese.
They are preparing for a wurst käse scenario.
Why shouldn’t you eat German sausages?
Because they are the wurst kind of sausage.
A German soldier during World War II was embellishing the number of troops he had with him
When the Allies thought it was just him, he claimed there were not 1 but 2. Then he changed his story to 3. Then he said 5, then 8, then 13, and finally 21. When the Allies made it to his position, they discovered that it actually was just him.
Turns out he was a fibber nazi.
An American, a Frenchman, a Spaniard, and a German man are all watching a street performer
The street performer notices the four men are very far to the back and cannot see, so he stands on a box and continues his performance while asking, "Can you all see me now?"
"Yes."
"Oui."
"Si."
"Ja."
My grandad used to say "If it wasn't for me, you'd all be speaking German right now" Lovely man, terribly bad foreign language teacher.
No idea why the school hired him.
Breaking News. Total caos and panic as Germans are flooding supermarkets to buy sausages and cheese
That’s a wurst kase scenario
Can anyone recommend good books on the German invasions of Poland, France and the Soviet Union?
A English man, a Spaniard, a French man, and a German. Go to a club. The guy on stage asks if they can see him. They said
What do you guys think of german sausages?
I think they are the wurst
What do you call a german thief that's robbing a fast food restaurant?
What do you call a German who is mad at everything ?
A Sour-Kraut (Sauerkraut)
800 in German Sounds Like if Zeus Became a Scottish Highlander
My German teacher yelled at me "die!"
I should really study those articles
How do two German cowboy car enthusiasts greet each other?
Have you ever tried german sausage?
How do German breads greet each other?
They say - Gluten Morgen!
What do German snakes say?
What did the german bread say to the other german bread?
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