You don't know the happiness I felt as he put his knife back in his pocket
They called me a lire!
and starts making self-depreciating jokes
I think they're being over-drachmatic.
...on Greece-proof paper.
Mom- We're going to Rome, then we're going to Greece and we're going to Mount Olympus.
Me- Where are you roaming to? What are you greasing? And I don't think its safe to mount Olympus.
Dad: "Well obviously, I want to keep my euros too."
Euro-pea-an
“Mom, I’m Hungary”
(Eastern euro joke 7/7)
Hey, stop using such Bulgar language
(Eastern euro joke 6/7)
He was Russian to get it done
(Eastern euro joke 2/7)
An Alban-o
(Eastern euro joke 1/7)
I’ll Serb you shortly sir.
(Eastern Euro joke 3/7)
Czech your privilege
(Eastern euro joke 4/7)
It just doesn't make any cents!
The would-be mentor insisted on going to a seafood restaurant and then he ordered his favorite meal for the both of them. When the hard working, fresh-out-of-journalism-school grad asked the veteran newshound how he always managed to get witty phrases from the Prime Ministers and Presidents he interviewed, a sly smile swam across his face.
Intrigued, she watched intently while he reached for his wallet then removed a €5 note. Holding it toward her face over the table, she was surprised when the greying beat writer dropped the money directly on her uneaten dinner and held an index finger to his closed lips.
As they both looked down at the seafood platter, his paper Euro was suddenly sucked under the rings of fried calamari until it disappeared from sight. After what sounded like a stand-up comedian clearing his throat, a male voice with an Eastern European accent clearly rose out of her food. It said, "Trump asked for dirt on Biden so I sent him some good Ukrainian topsoil."
As the gobsmacked gal with mouth agape slowly raised her eyes to her grinning dinner guest's face, he shrugged his shoulders and said, "squid pro quote".
Required Explanation: "squid pro quote" is a play on words for the saying "quid pro quo", a Latin phrase meaning "something for something". In the news at the time of this posting a tremendous amount of discussion is being circulated about whether or not US president Trump dangled a quid pro quo offer in front of Ukraine's newly elected president, Volodymyr Zelensky. The deal had nothing to do with seafood however, so that was just a red herring. It should also be noted that Mr. Zelensky, before diving into politics, was a stand-up comedian.
So for background, I work at McDonald's. I have to scan every Euro Bill 50 € and up.
So one day a dad comes in with his two little daughters. He places his order and hands me a 50 € bill. I scan it and scan it again and the machine won't recognize its validity, when the dad says:'That's odd, I JUST changed my printer's toner' Daughters facepalm other dads in line nod
Euro-bleats
Fiance: "For 4.50 Euros I got fries, a large drink and a long chicken"
Me: "That's called a goose"
He told me to leave.
All he said was, "I don't care about Euro Pinyin!"
Fiancé: where do you want to eat?
Me: well there's the mcdonalds and the currency exchange over there
...
We can get a euro.
She just walked away.
Vodka…Vodka…Vodka…Vodka Long ago, the 4 dictatorships lived together in harmony. Then everything changed when the Mao Nation Attacked. Only the Stalin, master of the four elements, could stop them. But when the world needed him most, he vanished (to his underground bunker filled with bottles of vodka). A hundred years past and my fellow AP Euro students discovered the new Leader, a vodka master named Stalin. And although his vodka is great, he still has a lot to chug before he’s ready to out drink anyone. But I believe Stalin can drink it all.
My application reads: Why did the German archer refuse to adopt the Euro?
...
Because he missed his mark.
So friends of ours are at EuroDisney and they just sent my wife a message saying that they were having a great time, but that they didn't cater for gluten-free. My wife's response (drum roll please):
"What kind of Mickey Mouse catering operation are they running over there?"
"All Euro bank notes will now be printed on Greece-proof paper."
That really needed to be in an email titled "important news," didn't it?
We were doing early morning review sessions for AP euro. I was running late and instead of cooking breakfast, I just grabbed a package of ramen noodles to eat in review.
While in review, I was happily munching on my 'breakfast' when my teacher walked up to me. The following conversation ensued.
Teacher: What are you eating?
Me: Just some ramen.
Teacher: Raw?
Me: Yeah, I like it raw.
Teacher: You don't cook it?
Me: Sometimes when I have the time.
Teacher: Well, you know, if you cooked it, it wouldn't be RAWmen.
groan
