Why don't convents have trouble retaining seamstresses?

Because that work is habit forming.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
A prisoner joined a convent and wanted to be a part of their marching band. What instrument did she decide to play?

It's a conundrum!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xwhy
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Official song of nun's formally leaving a convent:

Linkin Park's "Breaking the Habit."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AndySkibba
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are all convents non-profit organizations?

Because nun of them are in it for the money.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JemTAll
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Mother Superior had to crack down on sisters wearing perfume in the convent.

She said she would not tolerate such nun scents.

πŸ‘︎ 51
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/emjay144
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Somebody kidnapped a Sister from our local convent because there was no security.

No fence. Nun taken.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2019
🚨︎ report
How many people live in the average convent?

Nun

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Who do you call if something breaks down at a convent?

Maintain-nuns.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Digipedia
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the nun who got into trouble for drinking communion wine from her convent's medieval goblet?

No, but it serves her rite.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Udzu
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2018
🚨︎ report
When you join a convent, do you have to sign a Nun disclosure agreement?
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/aetweedie
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2016
🚨︎ report
This year's Fibonacci Convention was a great success.

It was as big as the last two combined!

πŸ‘︎ 11k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdb12345
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2020
🚨︎ report
A new strain of head lice is going around which is resistant to conventional treatments.

That has left scientists scratching their heads.

πŸ‘︎ 13k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the locksmith convention coming to town?

I hear they've got the keynote speaker locked up.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/habsfan1112
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I cheated on my wife at the magma convention...

I got caught up in the thrill of a lava fair.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sk80Boi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I just flew in from a Transformers convention.

And boy my arms are tires.

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/nwa747
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to a Star Trek convention dressed as a tree...

..... I was the captain's log

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Yankee9Niner
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a butcher convention?

A meat and greet

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Cssum0
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
I didn't expect to see that convention of skilled printers in Madrid…

It was a Spanish ink-wiz-isition.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Oct 31 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to the dynamite convention yesterday

It was a blast!

πŸ‘︎ 20
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/schutwo
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2020
🚨︎ report
A man brought his trike to a 4 Wheeler convention but was refused at the door for not following the dress code.

They told him that he was missing attire

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kashindabank
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the one about the pianist convention?

They had a few keynote speakers

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LeKrispyKreme
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
🚨︎ report
They only had size of shirt available at the psychic convention.

Turns out they're mediums.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheDave78
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried to sneak into a Star Trek convention disguised as a Doctor.

The security guard suspected I was not the Real McCoy.

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to a furry convention and they were doing a Shakespearean play

I think it was "Much UwU About Nothing"

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ultraferret107
πŸ“…︎ Jun 20 2020
🚨︎ report
The psychic convention is cancelled

Due to unforeseen circumstances

πŸ‘︎ 48
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fransisco_flores
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Went to a German dentist convention where they wanted donations of metals.

I told them β€œNein, out of tin.” Dentists agreed.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jacob0128
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Why do nuns go to confession?

So they convent.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dave_Paker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
🚨︎ report
Star Trek fans always expect a gift when going to a convention.

They call it the Enter prize

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2020
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine just named their child Geneva.

It’s rather too conventional for me...

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jjnfsk
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do mathematicians hold their annual convention?

Times Square!

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xwhy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an E-girl convention?

A SIMPosium!

(Not here to hate on simps just a pun i thought of)

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LukeGreywolf
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the German sales team get kicked out of the sausage convention?

They were the wurst people.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Crasty
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2020
🚨︎ report
There’s a new company that goes in conventions and claim they can track you by your smell

But they can’t do it without your con scent

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lurebat
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Don't order the carat cake at a jewlers' convention

The quality is excellent, but the serving size is only 0.2 grams

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/veryruralNE
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Native American naming conventions (contains a swear word)

My dad used to tell me this one growing up:

>Native American child is with his father. He looks up at him and says "Dad, how did you figure out what to name us when we were born?"
>
>The dad responds "Son, it's easy: I just looked around nature and what I saw is what I named you. Your sister, Flying-Eagle, for instance, was born while an eagle flew overhead. Your brother was named Roaming-Buffalo for a similar reason. Why do you ask, Two-Dogs-Fucking?"

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JandersOf86
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy at the locksmith convention who got onstage and talked about music?

He was the Key Note speaker!

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/flylink63
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2020
🚨︎ report
A famous horror novelist was at a convention when a man asked, β€œWhy are all your books so dark? I’ve tried, but I just can’t manage to read any of them.” The novelist responded,

β€œSo you haven’t tried turning on a light then?”

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MightyOtaku
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2020
🚨︎ report
TIL: A recent study found that the newest strain of head lice is resistant to conventional treatment.

That left scientists scratching their heads.

πŸ‘︎ 264
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the walrus go to the Tupperware convention?

To get a tight seal

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/KushaKeith
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I just got fired from a job at a convention center explaining in simple terms to businesses why they should come demo their products at our conventions.

It's my exposition exposition ex-position.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/eyamxi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2019
🚨︎ report
There's a nudist convention in our town next weekend.

I might go if I've got nothing on.

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
🚨︎ report
A new strain of head lice is going around which is resistant to conventional treatments

That has left scientists scratching their heads

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2020
🚨︎ report
A new strain of head lice is going around which is resistant to conventional treatments

It has left scientists scratching their heads.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hayeshilton
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
🚨︎ report
A new strain of lice is going around that is resistant to conventional treatments.

That has left scientists scratching their heads.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
🚨︎ report
I just flew in from a Transformers convention

And boy are my arms tires

πŸ‘︎ 110
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mumzaa
πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2020
🚨︎ report
A new strain of head lice is going around that is resistant to conventional treatments.

This has left scientists scratching their heads.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Earlier, I tried to sneak into the Star Trek convention disguised as the starship's doctor.

Security soon twigged I wasn't the real McCoy

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.