Contract killing Puns

A list of puns related to "Contract killing"

My wife screamed in pain during labour so I asked, "What's wrong?". She screamed. "These contractions are going to kill me!!"

"I am sorry, honey." I replied. "What is wrong?"

👍︎ 18k
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👤︎ u/sexxc
📅︎ Jan 27 2020
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A sad story

When I was younger, I had a friend, he always used to make fun of me for having a pay as you go plan on my phone. “You have a pay as you go phone. you have a pay as you go phone.” He would laugh. I decided to put a stop to it, so I took out a contract, and had him killed

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/Sandra-Clapped
📅︎ Feb 26 2019
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My wife screamed in pain during labor so I asked, “What’s wrong?”. She screamed. “These contractions are going to kill me!!”

“I am sorry, honey,” I replied. “What is wrong?”

👍︎ 15k
💬︎
👤︎ u/Bakedschwarzenbach
📅︎ Aug 03 2019
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