Bone Atrophy
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WubBeats
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2019
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If a trophy wife sits around long enough she’ll eventually atrophy
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shaolii
πŸ“…︎ Feb 23 2019
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My skills at sharpening my knives are atrophying...

I really need to hone them.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
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"I’ve managed not to move for an entire week"

"What do you want, atrophy?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lurebat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2021
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I struggled hard in the bodybuilding contest.

Turns out, I've got atrophy

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Masked_Death
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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What do the laziest people deserve?

Atrophy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JadedByEntropy
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
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What prize did the bodybuilder win when the lockdown was lifted

Atrophy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gambit454
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
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What do you win in a contest for doing absolutely nothing?

Atrophy

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
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What do old people win for ageing?

Atrophy

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RevenantCommunity
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2019
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What do astronauts say before eating a meal?

Bone atrophy!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Baconschniffer
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
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My doctor told me that I won an award for my rare muscle condition.

It was atrophy.

πŸ‘︎ 51
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Evan_Fishsticks
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2018
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My dad said I’d get osteoporosis if I drank too much coffee

I raised my fourth cup and said β€œBone atrophy!”

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/truciTenebricus
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2019
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Can't get this right, help!!

Need some pun help

Girl is a nurse who wants to try 27 spicy food places before you die. Not Tinder

My best so far:

You pepper believe that eating at all those places will turn you from nurse to fulltime patient. You don't even get atrophy when you're through

It's ehhhhh And seems insulting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MetalTango
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
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[Request] Blog name suggestions (the punnier the better)

I'm starting a blog as a disabled writer consisting of anecdotal posts about the funny, but unusual circumstances my disability and wheelchair put me in. Any names that come to mind? Particularly fond of blogs titles like Laughing at My Nightmare and Bag Lady Moma. I'm in a wheelchair and have 24/7 care, my disability is Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA)... go as wild as you like

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jessdon
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2018
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I saw a starving cat the other day

It was a cat-atrophy

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2018
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In a couple of days a champion lost many of his trophies...

...turned out that he suffered from atrophy

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pungunner98
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2018
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What did the Incredible Shrinking Man receive for his scientific breakthrough?

Atrophy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ContentDoctor
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2016
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Good for me, right?

I'm so good at being lazy that I was awarded atrophy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ScubaSteve9896
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2016
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What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.

Except muscle atrophy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dewhashish
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2017
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My Dad at the hospital.

For a little bit of background information, my dad suffers from multiple system atrophy and got a high fever, which turned out to be from a bad urinal tract infection. He has been at the hospital for almost 2 weeks now, and it is really hard on our family, but he is doing his best to get better and throws this small dad joke to lighten me and my brothers day.

A Speech Therapist comes every day to help him focus on his muscles in his face to help him swallow and speak clearer with simple gestures of noises and deep breathing. As she was done with his exercises, she said to him "Can you say goodbye, have a nice day! in a long sentence?" (As in one breath with no pauses). My dad then takes a look at me and my brother and says in his slurred voice "goodbye... have a nice day... in a long sentence".

The Speech Therapist just smiled and shook her head while we facepalmed...

Thumbs up Dad, I know you will come home soon!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Neil_to_me
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2015
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My friend Alexander recently broke his collarbone...

My friend Alexander recently broke his collarbone, and he was complaining that he could no longer lift anything with his right arm. He was particularly upset that his hard-won gainz would atrophy, so he would be stronger on his left side than his right.

"Now you'll be asymmetricAl" I said.

Everyone laughed I chuckled heartily to myself whilst everyone within earshot gave me a weird look.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 09 2015
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What do you call a former trophy wife?

Atrophy wife.

πŸ‘︎ 172
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πŸ‘€︎ u/msoc
πŸ“…︎ Nov 18 2015
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