9 Hilarious Asp (snake) Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

What do you call a snake that's exactly 3.14 metres long?

A πthon.

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👤︎ u/kevindavis338

📅︎ Jan 07 2023

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What do you call a snake that works for the Government?

A Civil Serpent

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👤︎ u/Chinius58

📅︎ Apr 24 2022

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A snake walks into a bar and says to the bartender

Where did I get these legs?

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👤︎ u/That-Particular-6489

📅︎ Jul 15 2022

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I gave my pet snake some glasses.

Now he's a see serpent.

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👤︎ u/OtherwiseKnownAsSam

📅︎ Dec 23 2019

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A snake charmer was bitten on the lips

He didn't know his asp from his oboe.

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👤︎ u/ProcrastinatorScott

📅︎ Aug 21 2019

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Why was the local fly population afraid of the secretive snake charmer?

Because he was Asp-hider

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👤︎ u/THE_SENTIENT_THING

📅︎ Sep 07 2020

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My pet viper swallowed a sheet of window glass causing the snake severe physical discomfort.

It was a real pane in the asp.

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👤︎ u/DreadMoor

📅︎ Dec 20 2019

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What do you call a snake that's extremely overweight?

A Fat Asp

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👤︎ u/Kerlandays

📅︎ Aug 28 2019

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When shouldn't you disturb a snake inside your shoe?

When it's a cobrller doing hiss business.

It belongs to a mamba dancer who had been practicing since he was a boa.

Fangs for putting up with this. Sorry for being an asp.

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👤︎ u/aitchnyu

📅︎ Jul 16 2017

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