17 Hilarious Allah Puns - Punstoppable 🛑

Why does Allah make the best beer? Because Hebrew’s it himself

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📅︎ Jan 02 2020

What did the Muslim train engineer say when his child asked why a creature so perplexing as the platypus would be created?

"Allah bored"

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👤︎ u/canadaddy-o

📅︎ Mar 17 2021

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I don't mind foreign dishes, for example we ate some halal food last week

I think they called it Allah carte

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👤︎ u/ledgerdemaine

📅︎ Dec 07 2020

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How do muslims like their pies?

Allah mode!

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👤︎ u/moist_bum

📅︎ Jan 21 2021

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Who does a Muslim ask when he forgets about the greatest Mughal Emperor?

#Allah-Who-Akbar

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👤︎ u/siddharths067

📅︎ Sep 20 2020

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What's a terrorist's favorite place to eat?

An Allah snack bar

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👤︎ u/B100DW0RTH

📅︎ Apr 13 2020

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Someone told me "you believe in god? No way!"

And I was like "Yahweh"

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👤︎ u/quafflethewaffle

📅︎ Nov 27 2017

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Dad is an older muslim gentleman, I remember this from when he was in the hospital a few years ago.

Nurse: "Your doctor should return in just a few moments with your test results."

looks at dad

"Oh, we also have a new room for religious practices if you wanted to do some prayers?"

Dad: "God, were my test results that bad?"

👍︎ 2k

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👤︎ u/Sumito

📅︎ Jun 28 2014

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The True God

I think Allah is the Real God because the universe started as an Explosion.

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👤︎ u/Norbingot

📅︎ Nov 17 2018

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What do you get when you mix a crocidile and a terrorist.

Allah-gator.

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👤︎ u/dal06iscool99

📅︎ Nov 05 2018

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Hear about Muslim that divorced himself from Islam by converting to Catholicism? He paid his tithe to the local Mosque

...as Allah Money

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👤︎ u/GEEZusChristman

📅︎ Apr 29 2019

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My new pun...

If you're a Muslim scholar on the side, would that be Allah carte?

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👤︎ u/goone_unit

📅︎ May 15 2018

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Who do Texan Muslims worship?

Y’allah

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👤︎ u/RHS_Aidan

📅︎ Apr 16 2018

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I don't think he appreciated them. imgur.com/xeoCd

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👤︎ u/Nickkchamb

📅︎ Dec 26 2012

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Hopefully they like her more than my Dad's puns

Driving with Dad listening to some pop music station. Meghan Trainor comes on the radio.

Dad: "Hey did you know that Muslims love Meghan Trainor?"

Me: How do you know that?

Dad: "I just heard they're Allah bout that bass."

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👤︎ u/youngnreckless

📅︎ May 20 2015

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My step-dad just got my mom.

Him - How many jihadists does it take to change a light bulb?

Mom - ugh...

Him - Allah them.

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👤︎ u/Wumaduce

📅︎ Jan 21 2015

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How do Muslims like their desserts?

Allah mode.

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👤︎ u/joshbp1999

📅︎ Feb 17 2017

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