My two sons 5&8 are playing Minecraft this morning on survival. They are working hard together to build their mansion. I crossed the room in front of the TV to grab my phone as they are balanced high on a wall constructing a roof. My son screams out, “Dad get out of the way!”
I said, “You’re the ones blocking!”
The other day I decided to install a highly decorative wall plug in my living room.
I needed a creative outlet.
After I was arrested, my ex-wife decided to hang a picture of my mugshot on the wall in her living room.
But she still won't admit she framed me.
Yesterday I purchased a world map and put it on the wall in the kitchen
I gave my wife a dart and said:" Throw this and, wherever it lands, i'll take you there for a holiday."
Turns out we're spending three weeks behind the fridge.
I plugged in a charger to the wall and my usb c headphone to the charger.
-Dad, what are you doing?
-Listening to AC/DC.
I went to the rock-wall place but my debit card was declined, so I had to pay with the coins in my car’s center console.
It was my climb-it change.
After many years of therapy, my psychologist has finally cured me of the desire to sit in the corner in public and blow on people that walk by! But now I have the urge to wear teen idol t-shirts and lean against the wall...
Long time fan, first time poster.
When I was in high school in Belleville, ON, a young local artist spray-painted a beautiful picture on a large concrete wall under a bridge by the Moira river. He didn't get permission to do this, however, and the city eventually painted over it.
Watching his picture go like that must've been pretty demuralizing.
Auditoriums are specially designed so that sound will bounce around the walls and ceiling in order to be projected to the audience. However, if you place a pigeon on the stage, the coo of said pigeon will not bounce.
This is because of a-coo-sticks.
What’s a Wall Street farmer’s favorite thing to invest in?
just a nether brick in the wall
While waiting in the lobby of a Chinese restaurant, Don was admiring a painting on the wall of a Chinese sailing vessel and said to his friend Mike: “Isn’t that a great looking ship?” Mike replied:
When you roll in from a night out but you're tyred so you just sit down in the garden slumped against the wall
When I was renovating my house, I found a secret stash hidden in the walls.
Someone drew a mustache on the wall behind the wall paper.
Dad:”back when I had to do wall-sits in school..”
“I had enough and told my gym teacher I couldn’t stand doing them
The election is happening in November and Trump will be bragging about the 30 foot wall he built on the Mexican border.
But he probably should have made it much longer than that.
My wife was hanging 7 pictures in a row on the wall when I told her should should hang 3 over 4.
It’s created a real division in our home.
Eventually, we’re all doomed to end up in super modern offices where the walls are whiteboards
The writing is on the wall
I just fixed the cracks in the wall...
...it looks spack-tacular.
I found a hole in my wall that I didn't know existed
Me: I never knew that hole was there
My Dad: where did you think it was?
I then proceeded to laugh way too much
In a one story house the walls are blue, the chairs are blue, the floor is blue, the lights are blue, the living room is blue, the bedrooms are blue, the kitchen is blue, even the air has a blueish tint. What color are the stairs?
The house is ONE STORY it has no stairs.
Go make a hole in the corner of the wall...
A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall.
The police are looking into it.
I insist that the one-sided wall was invented somewhere in Alabama...
Who's going to be in charge of Trumps border wall?
The Secretary of da' Fence!
Whenever I go near my bed in VR it moves 4 feet into the wall...
There was an emergency when I used an impact driver to make a hole in the wall
Every time we were putting screws in the wall...
Dad would turn on the stud finder, point it at himself and say "Found one!"
Every. Time.
Another Brick In The Wall
Kids are playing Minecraft, I'm playing random stuff in iTunes:
Daughter: Oh, is this Another Brick in the Wall?
Me: Yep! Pink Floyd.
Son: So is this...
I look over and he has this shit eating grin on his face and is literally laying a brick wall in Minecraft.
Daughter and I roll our eyes and look back at our screens. I'm so proud right now though :)
EDIT: Formatting
My dad put one out there about the salt wall collapse in Chicago
He said it was a Na-tural disaster.
I linked him here
Relevant link: http://abc7chicago.com/news/morton-salt-collapse-covers-cars-at-acura-dealership/455616/
Mom was in the living room hammering a nail in the wall to hang a frame...
...and she says "I think I hit a stud."
My dad yells out from the kitchen "That's funny, I didn't feel anything!"
During renovation works in my friend's appartment, they wrapped the elevator. People went into a dadjoke competition on the cardboard walls. (Link to imgur album in text)
We discussed Robert Frost's "Mending Wall" today in Lit
Me: so I guess you could say he rides the fence about fences.
Classmate: and he doesn't want anyone to take offence about it.
Me: I gate what you're saying.
While fixing a crack in my grandfather's wall
My mom: "George, you're just making it worse!"
Dad: "He's all cracked up."
There's a hole in the nudist camp's wall
The police are looking into it.
A hole has been found in the wall of a nudist colony.
The police are looking into it
There's a hole in the nudist colony wall.
Police are looking into it.
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