The pessimist sees a dark tunnel. The optimist sees a light at the end of the tunnel. The realist sees a freight train.
The train driver sees three idiots standing on the tracks.
π︎ 107
π
︎ Dec 12 2020
An old man was driving his carpool through a tunnel and he said,
"These are the carpool tunnels."
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 20 2020
My carpal tunnel syndrome is acting up
It could all be fixed with a simple tendon transplant, but the surgery is so expensive, and I'm really worried about going under the knife. I guess it's just not a wrist I'm willing to take.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Aug 27 2020
I have an exciting new job as an explosives engineer blowing up mountains for tunnels and roads.
It's Groundbreaking work.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Sep 23 2020
Carpool Tunnel
...just might fix this dang traffic problem we're having
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 23 2020
My wrists are killing me from driving my coworkers everyday through tunnels and traffic.
Dr. Says I have a bad case of car pool tunnel.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 16 2020
Recently, I've resigned from my position as a tunnel drill operator.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 10 2020
Prisoner tunnels out of jail and emerges in a school playground shouting βIβm freeβ!
Little girl walks up and shouts βIβm four!β
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jun 28 2020
My friend wanted to dig an underground tunnel, I told him...
π︎ 17
π
︎ May 18 2020
So, I was on the train the other day, and you know how it takes a while to get to the city, well my phone battery was flat and I didn't have a book, so I was a bit bored, but then I realised that there is all this cool graffiti on the tunnel walls... and um... so my phone was dead... and.. the city?
Oh darn it! I lost my train of thought.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 22 2020
I freak out when I go through a tunnel, but only when someone else is driving.
Doctor says I have carpool tunnel syndrome.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 07 2019
I have a fear of driving through tunnels with multiple people in the car
Doc said it's Carpool Tunnel Syndrome
π︎ 49
π
︎ Jul 29 2019
My wrists hurt whenever I drive to work with my co-workers and we go through a tunnel.
I think it's carpool tunnel syndrome.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Oct 18 2019
What do you call tunnels in the Phillipines?
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 17 2019
Did you hear about the tunnel that makes you illiterate?
Donβt read too much into it.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Feb 14 2019
Studies show when car-pooling, when going through a tunnel, people who sit in the back are shown to experience more anxiety.
Scientists call it "car-pool tunnel syndrome"
π︎ 52
π
︎ Mar 03 2018
I had to leave my job excavating tunnels
π︎ 34
π
︎ Aug 21 2017
When making new tunnels on the western plain, prairie dogs get help
The hole family pitches in
π︎ 10
π
︎ Sep 13 2018
When I'm driving through tunnels, I don't like using the carpool lane...
I'm afraid of carpool tunnel
π︎ 5
π
︎ Oct 24 2018
Driving through the harbour tunnel in Baltimore, I asked my kids to tell me if they see anything interesting in the tunnel...
They said there was nothing interesting, just tiles and other cars. I said that's because the tunnel is "bored".
They didn't get it. I told them you have to dig deep for that one.
Eventually they got it, and told me to stop telling bad jokes. I wanted to see how low I could go.
π︎ 295
π
︎ Oct 13 2015
Was playing Astroneer and found myself wishing I had some way I could make bigger tunnels easier...
π︎ 32
π
︎ Feb 18 2017
My wife is going in for carpal tunnel surgery today...
... so I'm taking the day off to give her a hand :D. (Actually happening. Wish us luck!!)
π︎ 27
π
︎ Jun 15 2017
Did you hear the one about the guy who quit his job as a tunnel excavator?
He thought the work was boring.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Dec 17 2014
Nobody is talking about Elon Musk's tunnel digging enterprise, The Boring Company...
It's not very interesting
π︎ 10
π
︎ Feb 06 2018
Tom Hanks walked into a wind tunnel.
The wind tunnel says to him "It's a pleasure to meet you Mr Hanks, I'm a huge fan."
π︎ 29
π
︎ Oct 12 2017
I bought a used wind tunnel for really cheap but underestimated the strength of the fans.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Mar 20 2018
Why was the tunnel always getting into trouble?
π︎ 4
π
︎ Apr 27 2017
Here comes the tunnel.
Had the 3 kids in the back of the car while we were on the freeway in the carpool lane. As we entered a tunnel I started screaming and as we exited the tunnel I stopped. The kids all stared at me and I very calmly explained that I had carpool tunnel syndrome. Lots of rolling eyes after that.
π︎ 132
π
︎ Oct 21 2015
π︎ 3
π
︎ Sep 22 2016
When trying to find out where the tunnels are on a trip?
Me: Where are the tunnels between here and Philly?
Dad: Under the Mountains
π︎ 37
π
︎ Dec 17 2014
What do they call a traffic jam in the Lincoln Tunnel?
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 16 2017
My dad recently went in for carpal tunnel surgery.
Before the doctors put him under, he asked "Will I be able to play the violin after this surgery?"
The doctors said, "Of course."
He replies, "Good, because I couldn't play it before."
π︎ 98
π
︎ Sep 27 2013
Who's in charge of the militarised tunnel bore?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 03 2015
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
