A woman is on trial for beating her significant other with a guitar. βFirst offender?β the judge asked.
βNoβ she replied. βFirst a Gibson , then a Fenderβ
π︎ 363
π
︎ Dec 03 2020
A Harper Lee novel on trial refused to open up about their case case, but was still judged by it's cover.
Moral of the story... Don't kill animals.
Edit: remove one case
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 19 2021
In a trial
not of people, but of dough, everyone is seated. The judge enters the room,
The officer: all rise
π︎ 5
π
︎ Dec 06 2020
Letting you all know that I've volunteered for the Russian vaccine trials held here in Melbourne. I received my first shot at 9.00 am this morning
Itβs completely safe with ΠΈo side effects whatsoeveΡ, and im currently feelshΞΊΞΉ ΟoΟoshΟ Ρ ΡΡΠ²ΡΡΠ²ΡΡ ΡΠ΅Π±Ρ Π½Π΅ΠΌΠ½ΠΎΠ³ΠΎ ΡΡΡΠ°Π½Π½ΠΎ ΠΈ Ρ Π΄ΡΠΌΠ°Ρ, ΡΡΠΎ Π²ΡΡΠ°ΡΠΈΠ» ΠΎΡΠ»ΠΈΠ½ΡΠ΅ ΡΡΠΈ.
π︎ 108
π
︎ Sep 17 2020
Science calls it as "randomized clinical trial controlled with placebo", whereas I call it as..
π︎ 6
π
︎ Sep 26 2020
A man in a drug trial died from a complication which dissolved his pneumogastric nerve, the coroner listed the cause of death as...
π︎ 11
π
︎ Sep 23 2020
When I tried to admit new evidence to the trial, the judge threw a Granny Smith at me...
I then remembered it's an apple-late court.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jul 24 2020
They celebrate the trials and tribulations of the inventors of Kotex today during Women's History Month!
It's a rags to riches story
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 12 2020
Why were all the witnesses at Shakira's trial THJR replacement patients?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Mar 09 2020
A lawyer and a law maker had been in an argument for several years, escalating into a bet to see who would break the law first. The lawyer then found himself in a trial against the law maker.
The law maker was outlawed.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Feb 05 2020
Why was the Christmas tree on trial?
π︎ 7
π
︎ Dec 24 2019
What happens to sailors put on trial?
They are judged by a jury of their piers.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Nov 15 2019
A man was on trial for producing cents covered in a thin layer of gold...
π︎ 4
π
︎ Jan 04 2020
A man went to trial for hiding in a perfume bottle.
π︎ 107
π
︎ Jul 28 2018
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 29 2018
During a trial, the judge called me egotistical and conceited.
π︎ 25
π
︎ Nov 27 2018
The prosecuting attorney would lose every trial because he was too namby-pamby...
He had a lack of conviction that led to a lack of conviction.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 10 2019
Did you hear about the 4 men who were recently on trial for robbing a calendar shop of 8 calendars?
They all got 2 years each.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 19 2018
How do you ensure a dock gets a fair trial?
Have it decided by a jury of his piers
π︎ 17
π
︎ Oct 24 2018
When all hope was lost in the courtroom, the defendant attorney suddenly came out of some luggage and won the trial with efficiency and success.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 28 2019
A quick court trial of a man charged with stealing men's underwear in his leather rectangular container
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 22 2018
Whatβs a churchgoerβs favorite part of a trial?
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 26 2018
A woman was on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection
the judge says: "First offender" The woman replies: "No, first a Gibson, the a Fender"
π︎ 18
π
︎ Dec 16 2020
A woman is on trial for beating up a unfaithful rockstar husband with his guitar collection
The judge asked her, βfirst offenderβ
βNo,β she says βfirst a Gibson then a Fender
π︎ 4
π
︎ Nov 17 2020
A bit nervous, but yesterday I volunteered for the COVID-19 vaccine trials.
The vaccine is one that was created in Russia. I received my first shot this morning at 7:00 am, and I wanted to let you all know that itβs completely safe, with ΠΈo side effects whatsoeveΡ, and that I feelshΞΊΞΉ ΟoΟoshΞΏΜ Ρ ΡΡΠ²ΡΡΠ²ΡΡ ΡΠ΅Π±Ρ Π½Π΅ΠΌΠ½ΠΎΠ³ΠΎ ΡΡΡΠ°Π½Π½ΠΎ ΠΈ Ρ Π΄ΡΠΌΠ°Ρ, ΡΡΠΎ Π²ΡΡΠ°ΡΠΈΠ» ΠΎΡΠ»ΠΈΠ½ΡΠ΅ ΡΡΠΈ.
π︎ 12
π
︎ Sep 28 2020
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, "First offender?"
She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!β
π︎ 43
π
︎ Apr 24 2020
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
The judge asksΒ her, "First offender?β She says, βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!"
π︎ 206
π
︎ Aug 30 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection...
The judge asks, βFirst offender?β The wife replies, βNo, first a Gibson, then a Fender.β
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Jan 21 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, βFirst offender?
β She says, βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!β
π︎ 31
π
︎ Oct 28 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, βFirst offender?
β She says, βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!β
π︎ 43
π
︎ Nov 05 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, βFirst offender?
β She says, βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!β
π︎ 28
π
︎ Nov 03 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, "First offender?" She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!β
π︎ 30
π
︎ Oct 07 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge asks her, "First offender?" She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!"
π︎ 16
π
︎ Oct 21 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, βFirst offender?
β She says, βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!β
π︎ 10
π
︎ Oct 30 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, βFirst offender?
β She says, βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!β
π︎ 3
π
︎ Nov 08 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says "first offender?" She says,
No, first a Gibson, then a fender
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 05 2019
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
The judge says, "First offender?"
She says, "No, first a Gibson, then a Fender!"
π︎ 139
π
︎ Dec 20 2017
So a women is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. During her court hearing the judge asks, "First offender?"
The woman says, "No first a gibson, then a fender."
π︎ 104
π
︎ Aug 06 2015
A woman was on trial...
...for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
Judge says: βFirst offender?'
Woman replies: βNo, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!'
π︎ 9
π
︎ Dec 08 2018
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. The judge says, "First offender?" She says, "No, first a Gibson, then a Fender!"
π︎ 21
π
︎ Feb 24 2018
A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection...
Judge says, "First offender?"
She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!"
π︎ 102
π
︎ Nov 03 2016
A women is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection.
The judge asks her, "First offender?"
She says, "No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!"
π︎ 3
π
︎ Dec 24 2018
What do you call a short court trial?
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jun 13 2017
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
