I have a job I need filling. Trainee contortionist wanted.

Must be flexible

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
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a train driver is trained, so he is the trainee
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheLucksmith-
πŸ“…︎ Aug 09 2018
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Dadjoked a new trainee

So I work in a restaurant and one of the duties shared by the servers is marrying ketchups, which is basically just pouring half full ketchups into each other so we don't end up pouring new ketchup on top of old ketchup.

A new server asked me the best way to do this so I took her back to the kitchen, grabbed two bottles of ketchup and proclaimed:

"If anybody knows of any reason why these two ketchups should not be joined in holy condimony, let them speak now, or forever hold their mustard."

She laughed, other servers were unimpressed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Only1nDreams
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2014
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What do you call someone who sells meats over the phone?

A delimarketer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/grayfelt
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2018
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*after the train had had trouble stopping in the right spot for multiple consecutive stops* Mom: I guess the guy driving is new.

Dad: Maybe he's a trainee.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2019
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What do you call a railroad apprentice?

A trainee.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/martzfartz
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2016
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Dad joked the New Years Resolution-ers at work

A few of the new trainees approached me at work today and told me how part of their (and probably every other American's) New Years Resolutions were to get in better shape. They proceeded to ask me if I knew any gyms in the area.

Naturally I responded, "No, but I know a few James's"

Groaning ensued.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Honeydipper_Dan
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2015
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