Thrownness Puns

A list of puns related to "Thrownness"

I got thrown out of church for claiming Jesus spoke with a lisp

It was a real slap in the faith.

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👤︎ u/qaddosh
📅︎ May 16 2022
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What city will you find waffles thrown on the beach?

San Diego

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👤︎ u/Phish_onthefly
📅︎ Feb 25 2022
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My wife got thrown out of a restaurant for breastfeeding

They said no outside food allowed

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👤︎ u/BjorkieBjork
📅︎ Jan 28 2022
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You know what I hate about donuts being thrown at me?

I donut see it coming

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👤︎ u/v19karma
📅︎ Feb 09 2022
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What's the difference between a sweet potato fry and a prosciutto that's been thrown off the balcony?

The one is a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.

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👤︎ u/damage-fkn-inc
📅︎ Nov 19 2021
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porcelain thrown

what do you call a toilet in a catapult.

porcelain thrown.

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👤︎ u/TheSalmonKnight
📅︎ Jan 01 2022
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Thrown Pizza =>

This is from last night, pizza night.

(I have two pizzas in-hand)

Me (47 yo dad): Hey kids (2 12 yos + 1 11 yo), i have a question!

Them: (in a surly tone) huh/grumble/no response?

Me: If I throw a pizza...(my eyes begin to twinkle)

Them: (seeing the signs, they scatter in attempt to get out of earshot, but they're too slow)

Me: ... Will it become at YEET-ZA?!?!? (I begin cackling)

11 yo: Busts out laughing.

12 yo daughter: DON'T GIVE HIM ANY ATTENTION, YOU'RE ENCOURAGING HIM!!!

I'm so fucking proud... Feel like i leveled up on this one!

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👤︎ u/ngnr333
📅︎ Jan 15 2022
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I had a wedding cake thrown at my face, the other day

...It really brought a tier to my eye

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👤︎ u/Ibbybibby00
📅︎ Jan 06 2022
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Why did the snowman get thrown out of the fresh produce department?

He was picking his nose

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👤︎ u/sourceshrek
📅︎ Nov 14 2021
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I got thrown out of the park for measuring the squirrels.

Guess they didn’t want me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/zu-den-sternen
📅︎ Aug 02 2021
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Fun fact: it's illegal to duck when push pins are thrown at you

That's called tacks evasion

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👤︎ u/berriobvious
📅︎ Sep 12 2021
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Why'd the plantains get thrown in an insane asylum?

They thought they were bananas!

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👤︎ u/epicnarwhal51
📅︎ Oct 24 2021
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Got thrown out of my local car dealer today

Told them to get Miata there.

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👤︎ u/Stearin_Snage
📅︎ Aug 26 2021
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Did you hear about the woman who got thrown out of Mime School?

Apparently it was something she said…

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👤︎ u/MrLazercat
📅︎ Aug 17 2021
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I got thrown out of the Facebook puns group for a post about ice cream.

They just said "How dairy!"

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👤︎ u/ratbas
📅︎ Jan 16 2021
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Did you hear about the tonic water that was thrown into the ocean?

It got schwepped away.

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👤︎ u/AngryBootman2016
📅︎ Jul 06 2021
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The park ranger told me that he would donate all the pennies, nickles, and quarters thrown into the wishing well to my charity.....

I guess I shouldn't be surprised that he never gave me a single dime!

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👤︎ u/esoper1976
📅︎ May 23 2021
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What's the difference between a rock thrown at you and a crazy girlfriend?

It doesn't hurt when the rock misses you.

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👤︎ u/wimpykidfan37
📅︎ Mar 12 2021
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my legs were thrown into jail today

I heard they committed a felo-knee

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👤︎ u/Echo_The_God
📅︎ Apr 01 2021
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My legs were just thrown in jail today...

I might’ve heard this wrong, but I think they committed feloknees?

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👤︎ u/Akorical
📅︎ Feb 08 2021
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What’s the cheapest meat?

Deer Balls. They’re under a buck.

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👤︎ u/dangerousperson44
📅︎ Jan 03 2022
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When the DJ played YMCA, I did the YMCA. When he played the Macarena, I did the Macarena ....

When he played Come on Eileen, I got thrown out of the party.

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👤︎ u/Scallywagstv2
📅︎ Apr 01 2022
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Certain Olympic events should be thrown out

Discuss

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👤︎ u/h0ll0wface
📅︎ May 29 2020
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I was arrested after dodging some pushpins that were thrown at me.

I committed tacks evasion.

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👤︎ u/FinalCaveat
📅︎ Aug 29 2020
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What sound did the piano make when it was thrown off the barracks roof?

A flat major.

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👤︎ u/Shu-di
📅︎ Jan 25 2021
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I was thrown on a pile of clocks

I fell on hard times

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👤︎ u/gssn-nospace
📅︎ Jan 13 2021
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I was thrown out of music school for plagiarism.

They thought I was stealing songs, but I was just taking notes.

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👤︎ u/ukelele_pancakes
📅︎ Feb 04 2020
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I was thrown through a window today.

It was paneful.

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👤︎ u/TD_KingJason
📅︎ Nov 14 2020
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Still scratching my head in confusion, trying to understand why was I thrown out of the interview room???

My answer was spot on, upon being asked to give an example on a "Business being completely ruined due to carelessness" All I said was... "A Pregnant Prostitute"

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👤︎ u/ball5deeper
📅︎ Dec 26 2020
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Why was was the unrepentant Roman who consumed his wife neither surprised nor scared when he was thrown into the Colosseum?

He was gladiator already.

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👤︎ u/trimofdoom
📅︎ Oct 29 2020
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A friend of mine brought a hen to a kegger but was thrown out

Turns out he committed party fowl

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👤︎ u/CecilBlight
📅︎ Oct 28 2020
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A stone thrown into a pond in 1990 has been wet for around 30 years.

Let that sink in.

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👤︎ u/dinner_cat96
📅︎ May 28 2020
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I remember having rocks thrown at me because I was a nerd in high school.

As they hit me, I thought, “that’s not gneiss.”

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👤︎ u/DinglebarryHandpump
📅︎ Oct 29 2020
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I was thrown out of the local park for arranging the squirrels by height...

Apparently they just can’t take a little critter-sizing!

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👤︎ u/Sjdiver2001
📅︎ Aug 21 2020
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Did you hear about the computer that was thrown into the sea?

Now that's a DELL ROLLING in the deep

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👤︎ u/dannysul256
📅︎ Jul 02 2020
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A radioactive leak in China has thrown the country's widlife into chaos

Apparently it's absolute panda-monium

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👤︎ u/soody765
📅︎ Aug 20 2020
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Someone has just thrown a lump of cheese at me.

I thought to myself, that's not very mature.

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👤︎ u/hirsty19784
📅︎ Sep 06 2020
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Me: i am affraid of randomly thrown alphabets

Therapist: are you?

Me : screams

Therapist : oh i see

Me:screaming intensifies

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👤︎ u/achrafmoucherif
📅︎ Sep 23 2019
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What do you call hashbrowns that get thrown in the garbage?

Trashbrowns!

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👤︎ u/cockinstien
📅︎ Oct 01 2020
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The audiologist had his malpractice case thrown out.

The judge ruled the evidence was all ear-relevant.

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👤︎ u/Gorflindal
📅︎ Aug 29 2020
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A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France.

Would result in Linoleum Blownapart.

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👤︎ u/dennyitlo
📅︎ Jun 06 2020
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I've got a condition which causes me to make terrible puns.

It's a dad-ly disease.

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👤︎ u/theswarthyknight
📅︎ Jun 06 2021
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I was thrown in jail for not having twine!

I couldn't make bale.

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👤︎ u/thomasbrakeline
📅︎ May 21 2020
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I just got thrown out of my local park for arranging the squirrels by height.

They didn’t like my critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/mycorona69
📅︎ Oct 05 2020
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I got thrown out of my local park after arranging the squirrels by height.....

They didn’t like me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/18021982
📅︎ Aug 27 2020
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I got thrown out of the park for measuring the squirrels

I guess they didn't want me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/BlakeMP
📅︎ Aug 09 2020
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I got thrown out of my local park after arranging the squirrels by height.

They didn't like me critter sizing.

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👤︎ u/WhiskeyChugger
📅︎ Jan 20 2020
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