Where do thieving birds go to drink?
π︎ 71
π
︎ Mar 22 2015
Thieving Chefs
Are the ultimate whisk takers
π︎ 3
π
︎ Feb 10 2018
What do you call a thieving alligator..
π︎ 13
π
︎ Dec 17 2017
Why are thieves silent?
Because stealing is not aloud
π︎ 72
π
︎ Jul 19 2020
A man has been stealing wheels of police cars.
The police is working tirelessly to catch him.
π︎ 282
π
︎ Dec 24 2020
Why do they always use thieves as the high speed units in RPGs?
Because they're so dodgy.
π︎ 23
π
︎ Aug 06 2020
Why do thieves have such a hard time understanding puns (pun line underneath)
Because they take things literally
π︎ 10
π
︎ Jul 29 2020
Thieves have broken into and stolen all the toilets at the Police Station
Detectives have nothing to go on
π︎ 20
π
︎ May 14 2020
Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Apr 30 2020
To the thieves that took my antidepressants
π︎ 27
π
︎ Mar 07 2020
The Apple Store was just robbed...
The thieves were easily idefinied from all of the iWitness accounts
π︎ 8
π
︎ Jan 12 2021
Some thieves recently made off with a bunch of sheep by riding them away.
Be careful, I herd they were on the lamb.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Apr 20 2020
Thieves broke into my house and stole everything but my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant.
π︎ 77
π
︎ Nov 22 2019
Why do thieves never get a good joke?
They always take things literally.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Jan 22 2020
When the heat turns down, we thieves gather in our secret hideout for a meeting.
We call it our Con Den session.
π︎ 4
π
︎ Mar 27 2020
What do thieves make their weapons from?
π︎ 80
π
︎ Jul 08 2019
Thieves broke into a Toy store and stole all their board-games.
Police are currently looking for Clues.
π︎ 22
π
︎ Oct 23 2019
I can't decide whether to join the Bard's College or the Thieves Guild
I'll just have to weigh the prose and the cons.
π︎ 20
π
︎ Sep 18 2019
My landlord says he needs to come talk to me about how high my heating bill is.
I told him, "My door is always open".
π︎ 9k
π
︎ Jan 25 2020
Some thieves stole hundreds of cans of Red Bull from our local convenience store.
I donβt know how they can sleep at night.
π︎ 19
π
︎ May 04 2019
My local movie theatre got robbed tonight, and the thieves got away with just over $1200...
They got 2 Large Cokes, a Large Popcorn, and a box of Skittles.
π︎ 13
π
︎ Jul 13 2019
What do olympians and thieves have in common?
They go for the gold, but sometimes have to settle for coppers.
π︎ 3
π
︎ Mar 20 2019
What kind of shoes do thieves wear?
π︎ 17
π
︎ May 08 2019
How do you catch salt and pepper shaker thieves?
With a shakedown from seasoned officers.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Dec 12 2018
The best thieves steal from birthday parties.
They really take the cake.
π︎ 35
π
︎ Feb 07 2019
Thieves broke into the police station and stole all their light-bulbs.
Police are in the dark as to a motive.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Feb 26 2019
Why do undead make good thieves?
π︎ 13
π
︎ Nov 22 2017
I watched as thieves stole from a music shop.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 03 2018
Whatβs the difference between Keanu and a bakery thief?
Keanu is breathtaking, the other one is breadtaking.
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Jun 14 2019
The thieves thought they were so smart cutting the video feeds, but they were caught anyway
Everything was being recorded
π︎ 3
π
︎ Jul 28 2018
What bird species make the best thieves?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Dec 31 2018
π︎ 14
π
︎ Feb 08 2018
π︎ 45
π
︎ Mar 01 2017
I just got a job at a Samsung store. I've already caught 3 thieves!
Im a real guardian of the galaxy.
π︎ 23
π
︎ May 03 2018
I just watched a bad movie about sea thieves.
In a review, I gave it a 3.14 rating.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Oct 10 2018
What do you call a musical ensemble of thieves?
π︎ 35
π
︎ Oct 12 2015
Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
π︎ 123
π
︎ Nov 19 2019
Did you hear about the two thieves that stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Feb 07 2020
Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar?
They each got six months.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 08 2019
Thieves stole all the toilets out of the local police station.
Detectives say they have absolutely nothing to go on.
π︎ 14
π
︎ Sep 06 2018
Did you hear about the two thieves who stole a calendar?
π︎ 35
π
︎ May 27 2019
Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant.
π︎ 21
π
︎ Nov 24 2018
So I just heard about two thieves that stole a calendar...
They each got six months!
π︎ 7
π
︎ May 13 2019
All thieves are bad...
But birthday party thieves really take the cake if you ask me.
π︎ 18
π
︎ Jan 30 2019
Some thieves stole 50 crates of Red Bull from my local store
I don't know how they sleep at night.
π︎ 31
π
︎ Aug 21 2017
Sneak thieves steal constabulary toilets.
Police have nothing to go on...
π︎ 3
π
︎ Oct 23 2018
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.