Texans Puns

A list of puns related to "Texans"

Texan Politicians eat free!

At Blackout Steakhouse

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👤︎ u/_fups_
📅︎ Feb 19 2021
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After seeing Watt leaving the Texans

The team’s power ranking will only get lower.

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👤︎ u/Zkck0517
📅︎ Feb 12 2021
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Heard about the Texan with memory loss?

He ALAMO'st forgot.

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👤︎ u/PlankenSonja
📅︎ Apr 18 2020
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What do you call a Texan in an Audi?

Howdy

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👤︎ u/SirMrCluck
📅︎ Jun 09 2020
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What’s the difference between pornstars and texan drivers?

Nothing. They both suck. (OC)

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👤︎ u/Bird_lawyer69
📅︎ Jul 12 2019
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What did the one texan car say to the other?

HAudi

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👤︎ u/Frankfurt995
📅︎ Dec 04 2019
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where do norse texans go when they die

Y'allhalla

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👤︎ u/awilx
📅︎ Apr 18 2018
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A Texan and a Mexican walk into a bar and order a beer

Bartender to the the Texan: That will be $5

Bartender to the Mexican: That will be $3

The Texan, upset, asks why the same beer cost less for the Mexican

The Bartender replies, "Señor Discount"

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👤︎ u/Twigsnapper
📅︎ Mar 03 2019
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Texan came to visit my farm in Southern Illinois and asked me how many acres I had.

I said "about 500".

Texan said: "I can get in my truck and drive all day and never get off my property!"

I said:"yeah, I had a truck like that."

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👤︎ u/harryassburger-il
📅︎ May 08 2018
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Why do Texans serve pie with ice cream?

They remember the a la mode

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👤︎ u/TheOtherHoboBeard
📅︎ Mar 11 2018
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Who do Texan Muslims worship?

Y’allah

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👤︎ u/RHS_Aidan
📅︎ Apr 16 2018
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What happens to Texans when they stop doing drugs?

They suffer with drawl

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👤︎ u/amishandroid
📅︎ Mar 30 2016
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What do an information age bank and a Texan hazelnut lover have in common?

Net-teller'.

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👤︎ u/Arathnorn
📅︎ Nov 04 2014
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My buddy's dad made a dad joke after Gary Kubiak got fired from the Texans

http://imgur.com/4UjnpPq

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👤︎ u/CJS14
📅︎ Dec 06 2013
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To all ya'll in Texas without tap water

Get well soon.

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👤︎ u/Kimenon001
📅︎ Feb 21 2021
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Normal cat .....Meow...

Texan cat...... Meowdy...

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👤︎ u/VERBERD
📅︎ Feb 14 2021
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The first time my dad met my mom

It was over 30 years ago and they were both in the army.

Dad: "So, where are you from?"

Mom: "I'm from Maine."

Dad: "I'm from Maine, too!"

Mom: "No way! Which part?"

Dad: "Main part of Texas."

She always jokes that she should have walked away at that moment. :-)

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👤︎ u/Lizonya2013
📅︎ Sep 27 2013
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Stella had two great Dallas jobs: prostitute and refinery worker

It was oil , sex and toil on Texan soil.

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👤︎ u/stevebox2345
📅︎ May 08 2019
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German-English baroque music played across northern Texas.

Texan Pan-Handel.

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👤︎ u/Bigfoothobbit
📅︎ Feb 12 2017
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"You wanna know why he was holding?"

So the Houston Texans and Dallas Cowboys game was on, and a player got called for holding. When they zoomed in on the guy, his name was Clutts.

So my dad just yells "You wanna know why he was holding?"

"Its because he was a clutz!"

I walked out of my house after that.

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👤︎ u/JrM_306
📅︎ Aug 30 2013
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