Whatβs the difference between Taxes and Texas?
Taxes can keep your electrical grid operational.
π︎ 13k
π
︎ Mar 03 2021
To all ya'll in Texas without tap water
π︎ 5k
π
︎ Feb 21 2021
To everyone freezing their asses off in Texas
Go stand in the corner, itβs 90 degrees.
π︎ 66
π
︎ Feb 18 2021
Texas weather is making my best friend hilarious
π︎ 3
π
︎ Feb 18 2021
If Texas saw many, many more tornadoes
It would be called "Vortexas".
π︎ 30
π
︎ Mar 02 2021
After this week's bad weather in Texas, there'll probably be a baby boom in nine months.
π︎ 8
π
︎ Feb 19 2021
What do men wear in a Texas synagogue?
π︎ 10
π
︎ Mar 11 2021
The Texas state Aquarium taught a crow to play connect four, too bad they didn't teach it Clue...
I bet it would murder the game.
π︎ 5
π
︎ Mar 17 2021
With Texas covered in snow, does that mean...
π︎ 15
π
︎ Feb 17 2021
Texas
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 15 2021
Did Texas survive last weekβs winter storms?
π︎ 14
π
︎ Feb 24 2021
I just heard of an Alaskan who wants to visit Texas, but heβs afraid to...
...He suffers from claustrophobia
π︎ 2
π
︎ Feb 11 2021
Texas Prisoner Found Dead After Consuming Smuggled Fish Eggs
π︎ 13
π
︎ Dec 15 2020
I was in a bar in Texas, when a man walks in wearing a paper cowboy hat, a paper shirt, paper jeans,paper chaps and paper boots.
Anyway, the sheriff burst in and arrested him for rustling.
π︎ 24
π
︎ Nov 24 2020
π︎ 2
π
︎ Nov 11 2020
Something sweet I found in Texas
π︎ 33
π
︎ Jun 19 2020
I'd make a Texas holdem joke
But I think it would be a flop
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 06 2020
How do people in San Antonio, Texas like their pie?
Alamo'd
Best part about this joke is that it's easy to remember.π€
π︎ 9
π
︎ Sep 12 2020
How much was Texas Instruments fined when they were caught offering free breast augmentation procedures to employees?
π︎ 52
π
︎ Feb 11 2020
As if 2020 wasn't crazy enough in Texas today, a herd of cows suddenly burst into flames.
Scientists still don't know what the cattle-lyst was.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Jul 14 2020
Why did the man decide to get divorced in Texas?
He remembered the alimony.
π︎ 40
π
︎ Jan 13 2020
I walked into a car showroom in Texas and asked if they had any German cars. The salesman said βAudi?β ...
I said βHello, do you have any German cars?β
π︎ 11
π
︎ Jan 07 2020
Some people say the land North of Texas is pretty rough
π︎ 44
π
︎ Jan 10 2020
Iβm going to open an ice cream shop in Texas called *Remember the A La Mode*.
π︎ 583
π
︎ Oct 24 2017
Texas Lady
Hello darling," breathed the obscene phone caller. "If you can guess what's in my hand, I'll give you a piece of the action."
""Listen Dude," drawled the lil' Texas lady, "If y'all can hold it in one hand, I ain't interested."
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 01 2020
I want to get a tattoo of Texas around my butthole
Cause you don't mess with Texas
π︎ 3
π
︎ Sep 18 2019
I heard thereβs a place on the border of Texas and Mexico that is making giant manned robots.
π︎ 6
π
︎ Nov 11 2019
All my exes live in Texas
but my wives are from Utah.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Dec 07 2019
Hiking with my dad while growing up in Texas. Every time.
Tapping on a rock one of us is resting on or using to tie a shoelace, "You know, some people take this stuff for granite."
π︎ 2k
π
︎ Apr 26 2015
Stay safe Texas.
π︎ 155
π
︎ Aug 26 2017
I saw a magician in Texas the other day. His name was...
π︎ 2
π
︎ Apr 23 2019
I once played Texas Hold Em against a sheet of paper.
π︎ 16
π
︎ Jun 12 2019
I didn't really know how to play Texas Hold Em but luckily my friend was by my side to assist with raising and calling...
He was aiding and a-betting!
π︎ 3
π
︎ Aug 18 2019
All my exes live in Texas.
Funny enough, so do all my cousins.
π︎ 7
π
︎ Apr 04 2018
Why did the chicken cross the road in Texas?
To prove to the armadillo that it could be done.
π︎ 4
π
︎ May 17 2019
Texas Chain Store Mascara
π︎ 5
π
︎ Sep 04 2018
What do you call a muslim living in Texas?
π︎ 6
π
︎ Mar 01 2019
Did you hear about the Texas Roadhouse tightroping waitress competition?
It was hard for the girls to have fun since the steaks were so high.
π︎ 2
π
︎ May 20 2019
Whatβs the difference between taxes and Texas
At no point have my taxes ever been frozen.
π︎ 25
π
︎ Mar 03 2021
How do cars greet each other in Texas?
π︎ 3
π
︎ Sep 12 2019
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.
