Have you heard about the new television show where insects use science to solve crimes?

It's called forensic flies

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fun-On-A-Bun-3k
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2022
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This year MTV turns 41 years old

Thanks for the 12 years of music.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GottaBlast
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2022
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With the lack of sports on television, networks are going to show the world origami championship.

It’ll be on paper view.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VikingLord17
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2020
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There should be a Network Television show to inform teens about the dangers of unprotected sex.

They can call it "Genital Hospital".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/slowshot
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2017
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My dad asked if we wanted to see a picture of his pride and joy [x-post /r/funny]

He took this out of his wallet. Apparently he's been caring it around since the 80s: http://imgur.com/ri2NcWR. Making dad jokes before he was even a dad!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cali_grown22
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2014
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One I heard on the Johnny Cash show: "My wife and I haven't had a single fight in our house"

Guest: "What's your secret?"

Cash: "We go in the yard"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Youngblood519
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2017
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The definition of a Dad Joke

I was watching the terrible television show Long Island Medium with my Dad and I said, "I could probably be a Medium" Dad says, "And I could be a small".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nflebl
πŸ“…︎ Apr 06 2015
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Dancer Names

As a father of three, by far my favorite Dad Joke has to be claiming things as my "Dancer Names". I have at least one or two a week.

It's whenever someone says something in conversation which sounds like it could be a Stripper name. Off the top of my head, here are some I've used:

"Yummy Cupcakes", "Pansy Taboo", "Stamen Fuzz", "Dark Almond", "Squeeze Bacon", "Bolt Upright"

I'll often follow it up with a hint as to what that show may just be like.

Guy on television: "The bee is now covered in stamin fuzz..."

Me: "'Stamen Fuzz' is my dancer name. Quite a show; not for the allergic."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DaveboNutpunch
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2014
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