Can you guys cut me some slack!?
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2020
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A friend has deer using her property as a breeding ground. Some people would be mad, but cut them some slack. After all...

...they're just trying to make a buck.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/confibulator
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2017
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Boss claimed his Slack stopped updating yesterday

Boss [9:10 AM] Sorry - missed everything yesterday. Apparently my Slack was frozen...

Me [9:24 AM] We just figured you were... slacking. YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! https://media.giphy.com/media/v9rfTQBNqdsSA/giphy.gif

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BanditMcDougal
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2015
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Fresh pressed slacks...

...are the definition of irony.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/programminggeek
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2016
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My tailor kept yanking my pant leg til it dragged across the carpet.

"Bro, would you cut me some slack?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jeromocles
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
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What did my lazy tailor tell me?

Suit yourself!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tupperwarehero165
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
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I eat when I'm stressed and I'm stressed when doing taxes...

I wind up come April in a higher slacks bracket!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11 2019
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A swordsman was late to his training session...

Upon arrival he said, "Cut me some slack man!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xevetv
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
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my 6yo son asked to use the treadmill. (okay, weirdo) while on it, the dog’s ball rolled underneath. he got off - the treadmill is still on - and STUCK HIS GD HAND UNDERNEATH IT TO GET THE GD BALL. so i clean his skinned up hand and arm, get him calmed down, and ask what lesson we learned tonight...

β€œnever put your hand in a running machine”

signed, the single mom who may have went too far picking up bio dad’s slack

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kashtablau
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2018
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I was advised to post these here. I apologize in advance.

What did members of the Politburo wear to keep cool in the summer?

A: Lenin suits

What did the Soviet General Secretary say when he slipped and fell on ice in front of the Kremlin?

A: That'll leave a Marx!

What did the Commissar say to the workers on the collective farm when they slacked off?

A: Stop Stalin and get to work!

What did the Chinese President say when he stubbed his toe?

A: Mao! That hurts!

An officer in the Iranian army is talking to a subordinate.

The officer says, "Private, I think it's gonna rain."

The private says, "You think so, sir? The sky is completely clear and the sun is shining."

20 minutes later it starts to rain, a total deluge ensues.

The private says, "That was an amazing prediction, sir!. It did rain!"

The officer looks at the private, pats him on the shoulder and says, "Private, Ayatollah you so."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/crookedletter
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2018
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The pants factory has begun making all my inseams too long.

I say they should cut me some slack.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/garbagearmy
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2018
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I pulled off a gutsy dad joke this morning.

My wife woke up late. So she asked me to help her with her morning routine, things like making her a lunch and stuff like that. When she was ready for work, she said, "Thanks, Husband. Sorry you had to pick up the slack. I got a little behind."

I teasingly said, "Is it under the rest of it?" ^^Oh ^^man, ^^I ^^hope ^^she ^^finds ^^this ^^funny.

Thankfully, she got a good laugh out of it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/k_kolsch
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2014
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Not a dad, but planning to pull this one out on my children when I take them fishing

So, I'm carrying around all gear, going out to the river. I "accidentally drop it, and pick most of it up, leaving only some fishing line. I then yell to my son "come on, pick up the slack!"

And one day, I hope he learns from me, and does the same to me. And just when he thinks he's gotten me I responded "you must be trolling".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/2pillows
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2016
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Dadjoked my girlfriend yesterday

We saw a post on Imgur about movie stars being ageless, and she started going on about Sandra Bullock...

GF: How the heck does Sandra Bullock look better now than she did in the 90s? What is her secret? And don't tell me it's genes.

Me: Jeans? Naw, I mostly see her in slacks and dresses, so it can't be that.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2015
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Driving by a fender bender

One car was being operated by a small Mexican woman and the other was filled with four guys dressed up in white shirts, gray slacks and ties. Two of the guys were holding bibles in their hands so we could only assume that the group of dressed up gents were Mormons.

My dad slowed down and said: "Well, it seems to be that they let jesus take the wheel."

edit: grammar

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hammerbeard
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2014
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