Why you should knock on fridge before opening it?
Because there could be a salad dressing.
I was going through the checkout when my card didn't work. The cashier said that I should try the card again.
I looked down at my shirt and said, "but I like my polo".
I had to explain it, but once she got it she thought it was hilarious. I'm very proud of this joke.
Should've becareful of your speech
He should have dated Miss Universe
It should be called Yeaster.
Guess they should read the bio next time
"Hats" should be spelled as "HATS"
If you and your buddies should all get COVID vaccines and the doses need to be kept in freezers...
then you're cracking open a cold Bud-Pfizer!
My son asked me if he should take 120k in loans for an Egyptology degree.
I told him don't even sphinx about it
What should you do if your omelette starts floating?
The act of christening a ship by breaking a bottle of champagne against it should be called 'Shiptoasting'.
They should make a political organization for older people who've left the workforce.
Call it the retirement party
My son asked his teacher, "If a person should be punished for something he hasn't done?"
"NO" Said the teacher. "Of course not."
"Great" said my son. "I haven't done my homework. "
Why should you never play Hacky Sack with Bigfoot
You'll get you sack-squashed.
Why should you never go for a jog if it is raining cats and dogs outside?
You might step in a poodle!
(from my 70 year old uncle)
On which side of the earth should you build a house?
Reddit coins should be called Creddit
Why should Australians be banned from international chess tournaments?
Cos they keep saying "check, mate"
What should you do if your nose goes on strike?
I should have been making more jokes about the whole Suez canal situation...
I really missed the boat on that one
What should you do if there's a sink knocking on your door?
Why should you always wear glasses when doing Math?
I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes...
Why should you never change clothes in front of a Pokemon?
I was figuring out what career path I should take.
Geology rocks, geography is where it’s at. But ultimately, making mirrors is what I really see myself doing.
After she cancelled several dates with me, I told my crush she should start dating wheelchair-bound men…
because she’s really good at standing guys up.
Why should you never write with a broken pencil?
After hearing me sing my music teacher suggested I should be a tenor.....
Tenor twelve feet away from earshot.
My doctor says I should start eating hot peppers to boost my immune system.
He said they're full of Vitamin Spi-C!
My wife thinks we should allow our pets to share our bed.... I finally gave in.
After 10 minutes, our goldfish finally settled down.
What should you say when you see a mouse?
YOU CHEDDAR BE READY TO DIE!
Metallica should open up a chain of mattress discount stores!
And call it "Nothing else Mattress"
Dad told me I should be an astronaut...
apparently I have been taking up space for years.
Why should you never tell a joke in Jonestown?
Everyone dies after a punch line.
I think Rick Astley should've been the captain of the ship
He wouldn't have Ever Given up.
T-Rex: Look, honey... I think you should come to New York with me.
I can’t see you if you don’t move.
Should I worry about those ice cubes I dropped?
Nah, it’s just water under the fridge.
The creator of the knock-knock joke should get a Nobel prize
I finally got the Covid vaccine yesterday and as I was driving I noticed my vision was blurry. I called the vaccination center and asked if I should go to the doctor or hospital. They said no.
But they encouraged me to immediately return to the vaccination center to pick up my glasses.
My son said, “I accidentally put ketchup in my eye. I should have been more careful.”
I said, “That’s Heinz sight for you.”
Ryzen’s slogan should be “Ryzen Shine”
My nose should join the olympics
It' really good at running
Why should a poor person never become a comedian?
Because their jokes don’t make any cents
What's something you should never say to a blind girlfriend?
I think we should see other people.
I was wondering if I should go to work today, and then I saw some guys putting up a giant rectangle along the highway.
Why you should never give a balloon to Elsa?
Because she will let it go…
Why should you always knock on the fridge door before you open it?
Because there could be a salad dressing!
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