I recently traded in my manual transmission car for an automatic.
I got an automatic card shuffler as a gift for my poker nights, but I had to return it.
I just couldn't deal with it.
Jeff, a semi colon, and an Oxford comma walk into a bar.
They both have a great time.
My son kept losing spitball wars at school. So i upgraded his straw to a semi-automatic...
The police pulled over a semi going 120 mph on the interstate. Upon opening the trailer, they found thousands of ancient cutting tools similar to an axes but with the cutting edges perpendicular to the handle rather than parallel.
The rather oppressive female mechanic was trying to sell me 5 new manual transmissions
Luckily, I managed to escape her clutches.
If you eat beef, you automatically become accountable...
Because you’re now a steakholder
I've invented a new golf ball that will automatically go into the hole if it gets within 4 inches...
DO NOT carry them in your back pocket.
Who led the Jewish people across a semi permeable membrane?
What’s a Dogs favorite type of transmission?
Do you know why disembowelment isn't used as a form of execution?
Because semi-colons don't complete a sentence!
The origami semi-finals are airing soon.
You can watch it on Paperview
We told my 7 y/o nephew that his dad was to go into surgery to get part of his colon removed, without skipping a beat my nephew said...
Does that mean dad's gonna have a semi-colon?
San Francisco Symphony's AI-run orchestra didn't work out
predictable, as it was led by only a semi-conductor
Driving down the highway with my son
And we were passed by a large semi hauling a load of cattle. I pointed to it and remarked "Well, if that's not fast food, I don't know what is..."
Doctor: I'm sorry, but I had to remove your colon
I have a fear of automatic toilets.
They scare the crap out of me
What’s the Highest Level of Competition That a Semi Professional Sauerkraut Pickler Aspires To?
Everyone’s bragging about how big their semi is
Odd I prefer my house detached
I came across a great movie about a semi-truck with a defective refrigeration unit that had to deliver a large shipment of meat.
Unfortunately, the trailer spoiled it
Why are gas powered cars part of the LGBT community?
They have a transmission.
Big rig races
Big rig trucks cane never make it to the finals, they can only make it to the semi-finals.
I can relate to semi-permeable membranes
Did you hear about the semi-colon that broke the law?
It was given two consecutive sentences.
What do you call a semi driver rocking out to 80s music while carrying a load of grain?
Haulin’ Oats...
🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️🤦🏻♂️
I’ll show myself to the door.
-dad
The Semi colon is an important part of what?
The Semi-truck’s digestive system
Semi drivers who haul almonds
If I made a bot that spams every person who claims to be a member of the Pun Police with puns...
it would be a fully automatic machine pun.
What kind of transmission does Jesus prefer?
People who think semi-colons & commas are the same, are missing the point.
Before he passed away, my grandfather said, “Here are three words that would help open a lot of doors for you.”
Last night I accidentally superglued my thumb and forefinger together...
But don’t worry...it will be ok. 👌🏻
What do you call a truck driver who knows a lot about the truck but can't read or write fluently?
I don't like or dislike manual transmission vehicles.
You could say i'm neutral.
Did you know that "Transmission" used to be a masculine word?
Who led the Israelites through the semi-permeable membrane?
Who led the Jewish people across a semi-permeable membrane?
Jeff, a semi colon, and an Oxford comma walk into a bar.
They both have a good time.
What happened when the semi-colon broke grammar laws?
He was given two consecutive sentences.
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