What do you call the security in a Samsung Store?

Guardians of the Galaxy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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Who'd want to be Trump's security guard ?

you shout "Donald, Duck" & everybody would just laugh

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fitblubber
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2021
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The cows on my dairy farm have all decided to form a new financial vehicle made up of a pool of money collected from many cows to invest in securities...

It's a mootual fund.

πŸ‘︎ 32
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2020
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Graveyards have loads of security...

People are dying to get in!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PolskiHussar548
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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What do dentists and security guards have in common?

Cavity searches.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bogtownboy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
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I used to sell security alarms door to door, and I was REALLY good at it...

If no one was home, I would just leave a brochure on the kitchen table.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/andersonfmly
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2020
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Seeing Airport Security confiscate all of my smuggled sausages out of my luggage...

...Really was the Wurst Case Scenario

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/icemage27
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2020
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What do you call security guards who guard Samsung stores.

Guardians of the Galaxies

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/beingjac
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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A guy was stopped by security

Sir this is a private subdivision.

I'm just passing through.

What's that in the bag?

Oh, these are bonsia plants.

What's a bonsai plant?

They're small trees. See?

Sorry, I can't let you through.

Why?

NO TREES PASSING.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lurens_b
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2020
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The Social Security Administration

Is ASS backwards.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/altgenetics
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2020
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A security guard at an airport informs the pilot of a man trying to sneak contraband onto an airplane.

The pilot responds, "That's not going to fly."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/karanrime
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2020
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What do you call a security guard at a swimming pool?

The poolice

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ohhnoitsmeagain
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
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Why did I apply to security

To take away my insecurities

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ujdiejH
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2020
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Hey Kids, wanta hear a dadjoke about Social Security?

Ah, nevermind, you probably won't get it anyways?

πŸ‘︎ 74
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pizzamike64
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2020
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What did the kindergarten teacher say to the kindergarten security guard?

You can watch the kids, but don't Overwatch them.

That's just creepy...

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UnusualPete
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2020
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My boss told me as a security guard its my job to watch the office.

I am on season 6 so far, but not sure what it has got to do with security.

πŸ‘︎ 8k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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What’s a mummy’s favorite type of investment security?

Cryptocurrency.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BluPrince
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
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They’ve upgraded the security to hall monitors
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
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Security professionals advise to never use β€˜beef stew’ as a password

It isn’t stroganoff

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mr-m-meeseeks
πŸ“…︎ Feb 03 2020
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What do you call a security guard for a trampoline?

A bouncer

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Chonqme
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
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A guy with flame tattoo sleeves walks into a building. Security stops him and says,

There are no firearms allowed in this building.

πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Quint_Cordewener
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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I was recently promoted on the supermarket security team to look out for people taking 11 items through the "10 items or less" checkout...

I am now a counter-terrorism officer.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/E420CDI
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2020
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It's a security monitor. imgur.com/tSzAsd5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/daymanahaha
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
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I always have heavy security at my far-left political rallies...

No one should ever have unprotected sects.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shercroft
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2020
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I had a job selling Front Door Security devices...

but I got fired because I’m not really a PEEPHOLE person.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/youtellmebob
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2020
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My neighbor sells home security systems, he's pretty good at it too.

If nobody's home, he just leaves a brochure on the kitchen table

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2020
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I almost brought a screwdriver to the football game, but was stopped by security

They said that match-fixing isn't allowed.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/knittingmonster
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
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I have two dogs, Security & Shin...

... they’re my guard dogs πŸ•

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 08 2020
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I work in security, and i want to get a pumpkin for my desk

It shall be a security gourd

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brad_Barracuda
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
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Increasing security
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πŸ‘€︎ u/luckiest0522
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
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I met the world’s greatest security guard the other day. When I asked him the secret, he said it was all in his name.

Barry R.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DenialTwister
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05 2020
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Okay so recently I sued a airport about luggage security

Yeah, I lost my case.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Thor_kingofasgard
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
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Did you hear about the Goth computer security specialist?

He was hackin' in a coffin.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/superceder
πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
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I called my boss to tell her I couldn’t get the security system to arm as I locked up the office tonight

She seemed unalarmed...

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sockyg
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2019
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What do you call the security outside of a SAMSUNG store?

Guardian of the galaxy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zayer96
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call Security at Samsung?

The Guardians of the Galaxy.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DestroyatronMk8
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call Samsung’s security team?

Guardians of the Galaxy

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sportznut1000
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know what they call the security guards at Samsung?

Guardians of the Galaxy

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/detrickster
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2018
🚨︎ report
My boss told me as a security guard its my job to watch the office

I'm on season 6 so far, but not sure what its got to do with security.

πŸ‘︎ 539
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Automated-Waffles
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a security guard at a samsung store

Guardian of the Galaxy

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-_Anirban_-
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call the security at a Samsung factory.

Guardians of the galaxy.

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/J4KE95
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
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What do you call the security guards at the Samsung store?

Guardians of the Galaxy

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Samuelcbadams
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
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What does Trump's security tell him when he is attacked?

Donald, Duck

πŸ‘︎ 113
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CaptainOverKill16
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call the security guards outside a Samsung factory?

Guardians of the Galaxy

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call the security outside of a Samsung Store?

>!Guardians of the Galaxy.!<

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MacItaly
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2019
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