My son asked me if we could go search for geodes. I replied

"That would be...gneiss."

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Soulfox1988
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24
🚨︎ report
Whenever I find a difficult level on a game I give up and go search for a walkthrough in order to clear it.

I really should get past this phase.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FramDzi
πŸ“…︎ Feb 19
🚨︎ report
What search engine do the minions use?

Gru-gle

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πŸ“…︎ Feb 28
🚨︎ report
Why did the FBI search the duck

Because he was a known quack dealer

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DSHeckingL
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Ad for job search app!! Thought this will fit here!!!
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigdom83
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
🚨︎ report
After a long job search, I finally got a job in a company that makes telescopes.

Things are looking up.

πŸ‘︎ 33
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2019
🚨︎ report
After a lengthy search, I finally found an apartment in my price range where I can have my corgi and my pitbull.

Thank god theres still a-corgi-bull housing out there

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JCokeDaKilla
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I used to search for clams on the beach

But then I pulled a mussel

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Reditt_username
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
🚨︎ report
If you search for pictures of corn on Google you'll only get stalk pictures
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bobiam232
πŸ“…︎ Oct 08 2019
🚨︎ report
Google search result with a dad joke

https://imgur.com/gallery/Im6oPJt

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BeardedBinder
πŸ“…︎ Aug 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the math teacher search the fridge?

Because they were looking for pi.

Ok I know this is bad but shut up

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jackoquack02
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2019
🚨︎ report
My kids and I are in search of some fresh vegetables puns.

Lettuce know.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Designed_To
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Where does Spiderman search up things if the Internet is down?

The Webster dictionary.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2019
🚨︎ report
If you do a Google search for "missing mideivel servant boy"

It will tell you "this Page cannot be found."

πŸ‘︎ 202
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tbare
πŸ“…︎ Jul 07 2018
🚨︎ report
My car broke down, so I said, "Siri, search for car repair"

Stupid Siri seems to think I want AutoCorrect :-/

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/td941
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10 2019
🚨︎ report
After a long search for a rare sculpture

I found it, but went home disappointed. It was a bust

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Uglyoldbob
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Son: does Easter Bunny set out 12 eggs in the field to search for?

Dad: no he dozen’t.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pungunner98
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2019
🚨︎ report
If you need a job you should apply at Search and Rescue..

They're always looking for people.

πŸ‘︎ 53
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πŸ‘€︎ u/yakhuul
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2018
🚨︎ report
Abandon the search for truth!

Settle for a good fantasy.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2018
🚨︎ report
I went to Five Below today in search of some nice deals.

It truly amazes me how they stay in business when it's always freezing there

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FatKidFromTarget
πŸ“…︎ Jan 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Two vampire bats in a cave, one goes out in search of fresh blood in the local village, and comes back with a face covered in red blood. His friend says "what did you eat to get all that?" The first bat replies:

"You see that steeple on that church over there? Yeah, I hit it."

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/palpameme_66
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2018
🚨︎ report
In search of puns

I need puns to go with this girl's name. Her name is Fallon. Thanks.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NodnarbNiluar
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2017
🚨︎ report
What did the scientist yell out to the search party when he was trapped under a sodium chloride rock?

β€œHelp, I’m under a salt!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/boombotser
πŸ“…︎ May 22 2018
🚨︎ report
What's the search engine of choice for finding pictures of attractive people to stare at?

Go ogle

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/borgenhaust
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2018
🚨︎ report
Okay maybe I shouldn't have referred to my kid's dentist appointment as a "cavity search."
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RonPalancik
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2018
🚨︎ report
My step-father just became an underwater search and rescue officer, posted this on Facebook:
πŸ‘︎ 248
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rrranderson19
πŸ“…︎ Feb 29 2016
🚨︎ report
Watching the movie "In Search of Fellini" on Netflix with my dad

He says: "so they made a sequel to this called in search of linguini"

"..."

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/guavacadus
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2018
🚨︎ report
I exited the highway in search of some sausage.

Things took a turn for the wurst.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_otterinabox
πŸ“…︎ Jan 19 2017
🚨︎ report
What do you call someone who's job is to search for shredded cheese?

An investi-grater

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jwabike
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2016
🚨︎ report
If Microsoft had a statistical AI in China that dealt with search queries, it would be called....

An Asian Bayesian Beijing Bing Being

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nightmare1zero1
πŸ“…︎ Aug 20 2016
🚨︎ report
Microsoft's search engine is the best one for adult entertainment (porn). But after I used it, I cleared my browser history. I might have a disorder, because...

I Binged and purged.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pjabrony
πŸ“…︎ Apr 08 2015
🚨︎ report
My mom lost her car keys. Asked if I had them. I barely search, tell her I don't. Two weeks pass. I find them. Punning ensues.
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wellyeahobviously
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2016
🚨︎ report
Can someone think of a good pun about search & seizures?

I want to think of one for a research paper on the subject but Im unable to think of one.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/suna123
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2014
🚨︎ report
My search for a stock photo quickly turned into armageddon imgur.com/unalMst
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/inspiringlondon
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2015
🚨︎ report
Driving my son to the dentist, I asked "Are they going to do a cavity search."

"No," he said. "They already did."

"Tell me more about this dentist."

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/30thirteen
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2016
🚨︎ report

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