Why didn't the skeleton ride the roller coaster?

Because he didn't have the stomach for it πŸ˜‚ (lower the pitchforks, alright)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bo_TheBot
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2021
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What did the tin man say when he got run over by a steam roller?

β€œCurses, foil-ed again!”

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrEvilsClone
πŸ“…︎ Aug 07 2021
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A new hot single by "The Paint Rollers"
πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NathyDre
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2020
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What do you call a Pigeon on roller skates?

A Skate-Bird.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bad11ama
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
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What do you call a polar bear on roller skates?

A roller bear!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/powerninja101
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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That steam roller operator said the nicest thing to me as he ran me over...

I'm flattered.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ahughman
πŸ“…︎ Sep 01 2020
🚨︎ report
The lift is the best part of a roller coaster

The rest is mostly downhill

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/snorlaxfan1235
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26 2020
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Fidelity just announced a retirement plan for Rock β€˜n Rollers

It’s called the David Lee Roth.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/demaionewton
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
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What do you call pot on a roller coaster?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
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My sexual partner got run over by a road roller

Now she’s my flat-mate.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ Apr 12 2020
🚨︎ report
The other day, I saw a roller rink that charged only 50 cents an hour.

I thought, β€œWow, what a cheapskate!”

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xgold4428
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04 2020
🚨︎ report
Need a Punny name for upcoming Roller Derby Bout.

Theme is Mexican food and my last name is Bean. I know the possibilities are endless but I want something perfect.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Beaniebabiee94
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
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My friends never let me borrow money for arcade games at the roller rink

Cheap skates

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/druebird86
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2020
🚨︎ report
My wife recently died in a tragic roller coaster accident.

But at least I have a photo to remember her by. And a keyring.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/twogreen
πŸ“…︎ Feb 29 2020
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My trainer asked if I’m engaging my abs when I use the ab roller. I told him they’re not engaged, they’re single
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnippityPippity
πŸ“…︎ Aug 29 2019
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Billy Corgan rides a roller coaster

https://youtu.be/azhgpelu0vY

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bluesbrothers97
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Asked my dad why he was using the lint roller on the rug...

He responded with, "Because that's how I roll"

πŸ‘︎ 514
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tainted_memory
πŸ“…︎ Sep 29 2015
🚨︎ report
I recently got ran over by a steam roller

people said i should be offended but i was flattered

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2019
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What happens when a roller coaster designer gets high?

He gets super loopy.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/daplusl
πŸ“…︎ Jan 02 2018
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πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DrRoald
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2018
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What do the French tell when they are on a roller coaster?

Ouiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/average_at_life
πŸ“…︎ Apr 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the DJ ride the roller coaster?

For the massive drop.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/litig8tor
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm no longer afraid to say what I really think of roller coaster height requirements.

I've had it up to here.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 12 2018
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I wanted to become a professional roller-blader.

A pizza slicer just wasn’t gonna cut it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LordOfTheBored
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2018
🚨︎ report
My friends were arguing about which roller coaster to go on next at the amusement park. When they asked for my opinion, I told them I didn't care.

I was just along for the rides.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheBuccaneer
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2017
🚨︎ report
Why didn’t the rooster go on the roller coaster?

He was chicken

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/winnieismydog
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2017
🚨︎ report
Please help me with Puns related to Russian Leaders (and Roller Derby)

I am working on a set of signs for a roller derby bout. the team theme is russian army and I am trying to make propaganda like signs for each of the big russian leaders from the past.

I have:

Quit Stalin, Bring on the Derby

Putin on the Hits

Looking for some for:

-Vladimir Lenin

-Leonid Brezhnev

-Nikita Khrushchev

-Mikhail Gorbachev

Anyone got anything?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jimdier
πŸ“…︎ Feb 12 2014
🚨︎ report
My friend went onto a roller-coaster and he passed out on it.

He said he has never passed out on one before.

I said, "Gs, man."

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dreamingofcthulhu
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2016
🚨︎ report
What do you call a snowman on roller blades?

A snow mobile

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zugzub
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2017
🚨︎ report
Why did Buddhist fall off the roller coaster?

Because he had no attachments.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ayrane
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11 2017
🚨︎ report
A friend of mine got his son with an eye-roller

He was helping his son (7th grade) with some Pre-Algebra homework:

Dad: "What does 5Q+5Q equal?"

Son: "10Q?"

Dad: "You're welcome! Anytime!"

The eye-roll was strong with that one.

πŸ‘︎ 23
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πŸ‘€︎ u/justinerwin
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2015
🚨︎ report
Roller coaster

Whenever someone complains about bills... "You know, life is like a roller coaster... ...it's expensive."

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/P0p0vsky
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2013
🚨︎ report

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