What do you call a radio after it blows up
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︎ Apr 02 2021
The radio host sailed to the same part of the ocean each year
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︎ Apr 15 2021
I like to listen to music as I fall asleep, so I tuned the radio to the Metal station
I've always been a heavy sleeper.
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︎ Mar 05 2021
My radio never turned off.
π︎ 3
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︎ Mar 04 2021
Today I saw an ad that said "radio for sale, $1, volume knob stuck on full."
I thought, "I can't turn that down."
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︎ Dec 17 2020
I studied Morse code so I could tap out dad jokes with my ham radio, but I only learned half of the code.
So I'm no expert at it, just a pundit.
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︎ Feb 15 2021
My 12 year old daughter got me today. Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer was playing on the radio.
"What was the other reindeer's name?"
"Um, Dasher?"
No."
"Dancer?"
"No. Olive."
"Olive?"
"Yes! Olive, the other reindeer used to laugh and call him names."
I was very proud.
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︎ Dec 13 2020
Heard the song "Don't Start Now" on the radio.
Told my kids: "If I have to listen to this song one more time, I am going to Dua Lipa off the roof".
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︎ Jan 05 2021
I boughta broken radio for a dollar that had the volume stuck all the way up!
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︎ Nov 26 2020
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
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︎ Dec 02 2020
One of the local radio stations had a "Worst Pun" contest.
The best part was you could submit multiple entries, and I sent in a bunch, at least 10. I figured the more I came up with, one of them had to win.
But, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
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︎ Sep 19 2020
As we were driving down the road, "Sweet Caroline" came on the radio. I said to my son, "Little known fact, Neil Diamond used to be called Neil Coal."
"Until the pressure got to him."
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︎ Feb 28 2019
What did the phone say to the radio when they got hooked up?
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︎ Aug 09 2020
My wife believes she's a satellite radio.
At first I thought she was kidding, but apparently she's sirius.
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︎ Feb 27 2020
A teenage girl came across an elderly man sitting next to his radio, tapping his cane to a Lil Wayne song.
"Wow! I didn't think you'd like rap music!"
"I didn't, either," the old man replied. "It all started after my hip op".
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︎ Jun 18 2020
Why can't a Platypus be trusted on the radio?
Because they all have fowl mouths.
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︎ Mar 12 2020
I turned on the car radio this morning but I think itβs broken.
All I heard was βFFFFFFβ. Just white noise.
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︎ Jan 12 2020
I turned my daughter into a radio
She's not very e-static about it.
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︎ Apr 21 2020
I should change my name to Billy and get a job as a radio show presenter.
Then I can finally be a Billy-on-air.
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︎ Apr 10 2020
Radios play music.
And that's a stereo type.
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︎ Nov 25 2019
What do you call a prostitute that shoots radio waves out of her nipples?
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︎ Dec 04 2019
Our toddler was complaining about the music on the radio, saying she didnβt like it.
I told her you need to listen to The Rolling Stones because you canβt always get what you want.
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︎ Feb 19 2020
In a radio contest for a new fence. Need a clever caption. Help me out??
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︎ May 16 2019
I was driving with my wife and suddenly Pearl Jam started playing on the radio.
I told her, βIt doesnβt get Eddie Vedder than this.β
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︎ May 14 2019
My Friend Told Me He Identifies As A Broadcasting Radio Station
I told him βYou canβt be Siriusβ
π︎ 41
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︎ May 12 2019
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
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︎ Sep 22 2020
I saw a radio the other day on sale for $1. It had a note stuck on it saying, βVolume stuck on fullβ
I though, βI canβt turn that downβ
π︎ 144
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︎ May 15 2020
As we were driving down the road, "Sweet Caroline" came on the radio. I said to my son, "Little known fact, Neil Diamond used to be called Neil Coal."
"Until the pressure got to him."
π︎ 1k
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︎ Nov 05 2019
Yesterday I saw a radio on sale for a dollar. The sign said that the volume was stuck on full.
I thought, well, I canβt turn that down.
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︎ Jul 03 2020
I saw a radio on sale for only a dollar. Only catch was the volume was stuck on high.
I realized, I canβt turn this down.
π︎ 6
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︎ Aug 13 2020
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself. MOM: Oh my! Who!? DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something? MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
π︎ 4
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︎ Aug 19 2020
As we were driving down the road, "Sweet Caroline" came on the radio. I said to my son, "Little known fact, Neil Diamond used to be called Neil Coal."
"Until the pressure got to him."
π︎ 28
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︎ Apr 26 2020
I was listening to the radio...
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
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︎ Jun 10 2020
I found a vintage radio for sale the other day that was stuck on full volume.
π︎ 3
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︎ May 28 2020
I saw an advert that read "Radio for sale, $1.00, volume stuck of full"
I thought, "I can't turn that down"
π︎ 79
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︎ Apr 08 2020
Saw a radio for sale for only $2, wanted to buy it but the volume was stuck on full. Thought to myself...
... boy I just can't turn that down
π︎ 14
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︎ May 13 2020
I saw an add that said βRadio for sale, $2, Volume stuck on fullβ
I thought, βI canβt turn that down.β
π︎ 311
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︎ Jul 20 2019
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
π︎ 3
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︎ Jun 04 2020
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way into town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife...
π︎ 3
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︎ May 01 2020
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way in to town, apparently an actress just killed herself.
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife
π︎ 9
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︎ Mar 07 2020
Today I saw an ad that said βradio for sale, $1, volume is stuck at max levelβ
I thought, well I just canβt turn that down
π︎ 324
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︎ Feb 13 2019
DAD: I was just listening to the radio on my way into town, apparently an actress just killed herself
MOM: Oh my! Who!?
DAD: Uh, I can't remember... I think her name was Reese something?
MOM: WITHERSPOON!!!!!???????
DAD: No, it was with a knife
π︎ 3
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︎ Mar 30 2020
Today I saw an ad that said "radio for sale, $1, volume stuck on full."
I thought, "I can't turn that down."
π︎ 133
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︎ Mar 01 2019
I saw a radio for sale today for $1. Sign said its stuck on full volume.
I thought to myself "well I can't turn that down!"
π︎ 257
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︎ Oct 16 2018
I saw an ad for a radio that said: Radio for sale, $1, volume stuck on full.
I just knew I couldn't turn that down.
π︎ 91
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︎ Jan 18 2019
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