A mosquito can fly, but a fly can’t mosquito.
Easiest decision of my life.
It really bugs me out
Now it has no friends.
“Mama, mama! Did you see that? Everyone was clapping for me!”
I don’t think it would ITCH the spot
its death is in vein
Nothing - you can't cross a vector with a scalar.
MOSQUITO
It was malarious
The insect police force was tracking one of these malaria-mosquitos, when the mosquito fled to a farm. First, she tried to hide in the house, until the farmer chased her away with a newspaper. She tried to hide in the barn with the horses, but the barn cat took a few swipes at the mosquito, and chased it from the barn.
Finally, the mosquito set eyes on sheep in the pasture.she decided all that thick wool would be the perfect place to hide from the insect police force.
The police force arrived shortly after. They first went to the house. No mosquito. They searched the horses. No mosquito. Finally, they got to the pasture with the sheep. After searching and searching, they could not find where the mosquito had hidden.
The mosquito was on the lamb.
I see a pool of enbitenment
That will come back to bite me
But some are Malarious.
But I felt the waste of effort when I found 2 mosquitos still in the room, now I will have to remove the screen to let the mosquitos out and reinstall it again
It wasn't very good, though. After a few bites I got up and left.
I guess he would have to start from scratch.
He's malarious
They only had the Off brand.
They said they are sending a swat team.
I currently have a very uncomfortable and inflamed bug bite on my foot. This morning while making my coffee, I noticed a fat mosquito walking around on the counter. I called my husband over to kill it.
He grabbed a napkin, killed it, and said, "Wow. That was definitely the Goddess Mosquito."
I obviously asked with genuine curiosity, "What's a Goddess Mosquito?"
He said,
"It's the one that got us."
In the Mosquito
There once was a greedy ore mining magnate who wished that everything he touched would turn into iron. He was careful to always wear gloves except when making huge loads of ore, except for one day when a mosquito landed on his knee. Not thinking, the magnate slapped his leg with his exposed hand. His knee immediately became metallic and the sudden change to his blood pressure caused almost instantaneous death.
Later in the morgue the Coroner noted that it was a classic example of situational iron knee.
No, it's Malarious...
Mosquito tips fedora "M'laria"
Because it gives them a nice buzzzzzzz
"Itsa me Malario!"
Mosquito nets!
A diplognat!
M'laria
They are all married and have ten thousand kids!
A golden opportunity.
Because she has bad blood
Only 2, no idea how they got there
A bug-hati
That's probably going to come back to bite me later
It was a bah hum bug
They both scratch.
They were really sad but I thought it was malarious
With bug bytes
The kind that's small enough to fly through the screen door.
And the kind that's big enough to open it.
They were really out for blood.
Me: I got drunk last night and had a blackout.
Friend: OMG, are you ok?
Me: Yeah, but the mosquito that bit me and the electric company aren’t though.
A bit neurotic.
Some cities plan to fight mosquitoes by releasing swarms of sterile male mosquitoes, which don't bite, and can reduce future generations of mosquitoes. That's a good idea and I hope it works well.
The governor of Kentucky plans to fight crime by having prayer groups go to high-crime neighborhoods to pray there.
Those two ideas give me an idea for fighting crime even better: Release swarms of praying mantises.
The baby said excitedly "it was awesome; everyone was clapping for me!"
'That's malarious' 😂
He was such a buzzkill.
A mosquito!
I told her to stop being attractive.
It's because of all the bats.
You can't sew a zipper on a mosquito.
They're malarious.
A conservative vector field
Got my calculus professor with this one last year.
My dad got home from work today and noticed we have a lot of extra mosquitoes that have got into the house.
My mom made a comment that bats eat mosquitoes, my dad replied with, "We should bring them in the house to com-BAT those skeeters!"
Malaria is carried by mosquitos, but if you're clean, then your toes aren't musky any more.
A mosquito.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Ano.
Ano who?
Another mosquito.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Athir.
Athir who?
A third mosquito.
OK... so did you ever notice how every time you spend 4 days alone in the woods and you make it out without a scratch or even a mosquito bite, and you're feeling all peaceful and relaxed and at one with the universe, you're not home 20 minutes and unloading the back of your truck when you slam your right shin into the trailer hitch... and amid the flashing white stars around you, your fists clench, your teeth grit, your body tenses and every "mean, nasty and ugly" word you ever read, heard, uttered or even imagined ("Wait... is #*&%#@!!! even a word??? Oh what the heck? It works!") goes tearing through your brain.... and eventually it passes and you keep working, surprised you're not even limping and it doesn't hurt more than it does... and almost an hour later, when you're finished and getting undressed to take your first hot shower in days, you see a lump on your shin the size of Rhode Island... and the first image that pops into your head is John Merrick yelling "I AM NOT AN ANIMAL!!!... in fact, it literally looks like a second knee on your right leg... so you spend the rest of the evening keeping it elevated and icing it on and off, alternating between a blue gel pack and a bag of frozen peas.... and when you go to bed, you keep the gel pack on while you read and then take it off before you go to sleep... and then you wake up around 3AM and decide to check your shin and the swelling has gone down quite a bit... but since you still have several hours before you get up, you decide to ice it again... but the gel pack on the floor is no longer cold so you get up, walk to the kitchen and open the fridge... and after taking a bite of leftover pizza from last night (because... well, you're here and what the heck?), you go into the freezer, grab the bag of frozen peas and take them back to bed with you... but they're all frozen into one big solid ball and well, that won't do... so you lay the bag on the bed to pound it once or twice to break them up, but instead the bag bursts open and suddenly there are frozen peas sprayed all over the bed and rolling onto the floor... and all those words from yesterday come rushing back into your head as you kneel to gather them all up... but suddenly your anger completely vanishes and you can't help laughing to yourself as you think, "gee, I can't remember the last time I pea'd the bed in the middle of the night"???
Son: "Dad, today at school, me and two friends got chased by 3 bees, 3 wasps, 3 mosquitoes and 3 yellow jackets."
Me: "Was it a sting operation?"
My son was talking to my father in law when they yell "we are getting hit by mokitos!" (Mosquitos)
I yelled back "mojitos? Where!!?!"
My wife tells "we got mojitos up in here"
And my mother in law, not joking, says. "I hear they can carry limes disease"
Him: "is that from skiing?"
Me: "yeah, that's mah-ski-toe!" proceed to make mosquito noises
a Mosquito!
Now he’ll never have friends!
I think he's Malarious!
A mosquito can fly, but a fly cannot mosquito.
What do you call a funny mosquito? Malarious
A mosquito can fly but a fly cant mosquito (Told by my dad earlier lol)
A mosquito can fly but a fly cannot mosquito...
Is still an OFF brand.
