I just bought a new treadmill today and I’m not sure how to process this monumental purchase.

I guess I’ll take it one step at a time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dvddesign
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2021
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What do you call a typo on a headstone?

A grave mistake.

πŸ‘︎ 15k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sheikh_potato
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
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How to make a dad joke monument

Step 1: build a huge water restricting wall Step 2: call it the "i don't give a"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ichhalt159753
πŸ“…︎ Sep 14 2020
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without the washington monument america would be a pointless nation
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πŸ‘€︎ u/swoswald
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
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Why did the Egyptian kings stop building monuments?

Because it was all a pyramid scheme

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vshesha
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2019
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Why is the Pantheon Rocky’s favorite Roman monument?

Because it was built by HAADRIANNN

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Handsome_Quack69
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2019
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They made a mistake on the statue of Lincoln.

It was a monumental error

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UncleFuckingIroh
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2020
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A man turned to me and said, β€œI built the Washington monument.”

I replied, β€œyou raise a good point.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ldb477
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
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"Okay, I did learn one interesting thing," Gabe admitted.

He was finally doing the reading for his history class. "Did you know that Bin Laden was planning to blow up monuments in other American cities?"

"I bet St. Louis was next on his list," I nodded.

"How'd you know that, Dad?" he asked in surprise.

"Well, he was our arch-enemy."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cja1968
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
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This is a key monument in San Francisco. imgur.com/oSzTSwV
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ikingdoms
πŸ“…︎ Jan 16 2014
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Quote from Dad at the Washington Monument...

"George Washington may be the father of this country, but Coca-Cola's the pop!"

He had a good laugh...but no one else did.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/razmig
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2013
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My wife said to my thirteen year old daughter, β€œThey covered it with a giant black condom.”

That is it. That is the joke. Welcome to Asheville, NC.

https://www.bpr.org/post/vance-monument-fully-shrouded-lee-marker-removed

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aplcnlife
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
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I mistook a statue for the person you told me to meet at the park.

After a while, I realized it wasn’t the monument.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
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Where did runaway teenage Medusa go?

Last seen her rocking this gorgeous outfit at that Boulder City monumental gig with a bunch of stoners around.

Man, she was just stunning.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cheese_Cadavre
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2019
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Participation trophies

Apparently some kids just took down another confederate monument. Guess this is proof that millennials really do hate participation trophies

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πŸ‘€︎ u/altermycarbon
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2018
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Japan built a giant sculpture of Darth Vader for the Sapporo Snow Festival.

It was a monumental undertaking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pickelsurprise
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2015
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Crazy Horse

My brother: "Dad, have you ever seen the Crazy Horse monument?"

Dad: "No, but I do crossword puzzles."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DancingDaina
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2013
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