It was his claim to flame
About time he got on the Seoul Train
You'd think it'd be an open and shut case, but don't knock the police for not solving it yet.
D: The dawn of a new age.
But I don't get it, that house seemed pretty heavy to me
words words words
Onya Marx, who invented the starting pistol.
They made out like bandits.
"This is where the Magna Carta was signed," said the tour guide, "One the most important documents in English History."
"When was it signed?" asked Paddy.
"1215," said the tour guide.
"OH NO!" said Paddy, "We missed it by 10 minutes!"
The British were simply out-plaid
It's a not-for-prophet organization.
These were Hun Identified Flying Objects.
They were Finnished
He's an aye doctor.
The best American Presidents were stoned.
It started out as just one dress, but she enjoyed it so much that she started making more. She told us that she is now fully embracing her hobby, and had decided to wear corsets for a week to prove that they can be comfortable and not torture devices. To which I replied: "So I guess you could say that your hobby is fully embracing you!"
Bonus: About 10 minutes previous, I had told one of the other people in the conversation that I'd been practicing my dad jokes for years before my daughter was born.
They witnessed five victories Andalus
My response is usually "General Lee"
Does anyone know the Gettysburg address?
I laughed historically!
The Enlitenment.
When I fight with my wife, she keeps getting historical.
You mean, hysterical, right?
No, she keeps bringing up the past
My bf recently told me about this subreddit, purely because my dad is one of the dadjokiest dads we know. Today, I finally got to document a stellar example of his fatherly humor.
While making a sarcastic FB post regarding furniture I can't afford...
A. BC
B. AD
His name? Julius Seizure.
It only takes one nail to hang a picture
Too many cliffhangers.
No? It’s historical
Friend: “There are so many angles here”
Me: “Yeah, but I’ve always thought the Saxons had more historical importance”
Because X is always 10.
He quite sharp when it comes to historical battles
the Japanese Olympic Track and field team, in typical Asian make-every-thing-harder-to-do-than-it-has-to-be fashion have announced that hey are sticking by their regimen of only using malformed, decade-and-a-half old, equipment rigged to pop out of the course unexpectedly in order to secure their hopes of Olympic glory. While this may seem counter intuitive, Kadauo Osakamizu, a analyst for the team claims there is actually a historic cultural precedent for the odd exercises. In a quote, Mr. Osakamizu insists that the idea is that "if the team can excel with such sub-par materials, executing wins when the equipment is good should be of little concern."
So it seems that at least for the foreseeable future, Japan will be pinning their hopes on Teenage, Mutant, Ninja Hurdles.
Historically, on this day, prophets have risen!
I work in a historic house all decorated for the holidays. Visitor comes in: "Can we take pictures here?" Me: "Yes, just no flash." Visitor: "But we can take pictures right?" Me: "Yes....." Visitor points at the wall. "I want that one."
My marketing class is doing a fundraiser for the girls basketball team and it involves chucking rubber ducks.
The event is called chuck a duck and I need as many punny ideas to photoshop into posters as possible.
Also historic events that replace people with rubber ducks helps too.
But no one has ever heard of his sister Onya, who invented the starting pistol
Onya, the inventor of the starting pistol
But no one ever remembers his sister Onya, who invented the starting pistol.
