A list of puns related to "Michigan Left"
https://twitter.com/ESPNRittenberg/status/1478545103476211715
On December 2nd, 1988, 19-year-old Cathy Sue Swartz went about her morning routine as usual at her Three Rivers, Michigan townhouse. The evening prior, Cathyβs boyfriend had stayed the night with her and her 9-month-old daughter, Courtney. They had spent the evening decorating the Christmas tree, putting up decorations, and wrapping presents for Courtneyβs first Christmas. Around 5am, Cathy bid farewell to her boyfriend as he left for work, telling him she planned to spend the day catching up on laundry.
Around 3:30pm, Cathyβs boyfriend returned to her two-story Riverside Townhouse located on Lockport Drive, only to discover the apartment's red front door was slightly ajar. Alarmed, he entered Cathyβs apartment where he was met with a nightmarish scene. Blood was splattered throughout the entire first floor of the apartment and led up the stairs to where Cathy and Courtneyβs bedroom were located on the second floor.
Cathyβs boyfriend ran upstairs where he found Cathy on her bedroom floor, partially clad, beaten, strangled, and riddled with stab wounds. After finding Cathy, he ran to Courtneyβs room, where he found her unharmed, wearing a clean diaper, and playing quietly in her crib. He immediately summoned police.
When officers arrived on scene, they were quoted as saying, βAny adjective that you could think of as far as describing a brutal, violent scene was there.β
It was determined that the attack on Cathy had started in the kitchen area of her townhouse. It is believed a struggle ensued, and Cathy was stabbed. She then made her way to the foyer, the entryway near the front door, before running upstairs and down the hallway to her bedroom. There, it is believed Cathyβs attacker sexually assaulted, strangled, and beat her, before stabbing her more than a dozen times, and slitting her throat. Her ultimate cause of death was listed as severe blood loss. (See sources for apartment floor plans.)
Investigators found nothing missing from Cathyβs home, and discovered no signs of forced entry. Cathy was found partially nude, however was still in her pajamaβs leading detectives to believe she was attacked in the early afternoon.
It was learned that while a good amount of blood found at the scene belonged to Cathy, some of it was not hers. Investigators believe during the struggle, Cathyβs attacker was injured. Aside from leaving behind a good amount of blood and a near perfect bloody fingerprint, Cathyβs murderer also left behind some other bizarre c
... keep reading on reddit β‘Was visiting my wifeβs family in Michigan and she kept referring to βMichigan Left Turnsβ where you drive through an intersection and 100 yards later, you then make a U-Turn, return to the intersection and drive then turn right. Just about every major intersection around Grad Rapids was like this.
Fuck you.
Seriously. This is not difficult.
Oh, you found yourself in a left turn lane? ...guess you're turning left now, motherfucker.
That is all.
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