The cute waitress brought the main dish

She really took my bread away.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/geret13
๐Ÿ“…︎ Aug 30 2018
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This year's Thanksgiving playlist is a buffet by ear, if you will...

The main dish will be Lambchop seasoned with Red Hot Chili Peppers & Salt-n-Pepa.

Accompanied by the side dishes: The Cranberries, Korn, and Black Eyed Peas.

And for dessert we'll have Vanilla Ice..Cream..Cake.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/PeeSeaBayBee
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
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Build up at least 3/10

3 men were on a boat, having dinner. In between the starter and main dishes they went smoking on the deck. Once arrived on the deck, the one with the cigarettes figured he had 4 cigarettes but no lighter. He threw one cigarette overboard so that the boat became a cigarette lighter

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SpicyForefingers
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
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Just returned from China and my dad still has the same cheesy jokes.

My father his girlfriend and myself were out for supper yesterday. The waiter came around to take orders and she started with my dad's girlfriend. She orders her main dish and the waiter asks, "what would you like for your two sides?"

"what are my options?" his girlfriend asks.

To which my dad replies, "I believe just right and left."

๐Ÿ‘︎ 990
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Jasonborn23
๐Ÿ“…︎ Apr 22 2014
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Random terrible puns I came up with using (some of) the 50 States
  • Alaska girl out when the times right
  • Arkansas right? (Ar Can Saw right?)
  • Iโ€™ll California
  • Heโ€™s gonna Florida car!
  • Iowa lot of money right now
  • He was in a state of Missouri for the past few days
  • Heโ€™s the Maine character of the book
  • Mind Washington dishes tonight?
  • Can I get a Minnesota with my burger?
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/GodofWar1234
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 16 2017
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In icelandic restaurant

... I think I am going to order the whale for main dish.

-But is the table long enough?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/momtmuo
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 16 2014
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Dad jokes at the Indian restaurant.

At a local indian food buffet. We've been there a few times, but today the food is a little better. I compliment the food to the waiter and he tells me they're trying new things and aside from a few main dishes, every day will be different. He's really pushing us to come back the next day because the next day will feature lots of goat dishes. As soon as he leaves, i tell everyone.

"You know what really gets my goat? A guy who wants me to get his goat."

BONUS: They were out of bread and when I asked why I didn't bring anyback to the table, I said there was NAAN.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/MikeTheBum
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 26 2015
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