Keep As Pet Puns

A list of puns related to "Keep As Pet"

My roommate tried to keep two crows in our apartment as pets.

The cops arrested him for attempted murder.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Mar 06 2020
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For the upcoming NFL season, players will not be allowed to keep chicken as pets.

That would be considered a personal fowl.

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👤︎ u/porichoygupto
📅︎ Jul 15 2020
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What kind of reptile to math teachers keep as pets?

Pi-thons

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👤︎ u/someone425
📅︎ Jun 11 2019
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I cannot be-weave he said this

I’m terrified of spiders and had to summon my boyfriend to relocate a rather large one hanging out on the back door.

Him: Actually I think I’ll put him in a jar. We can keep him as a pet and name him Frank.

Me staring at him bewildered:.... name him frank?

Him: Yes because he frankly terrifies you.

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👤︎ u/surprise_shellfish
📅︎ Jun 21 2019
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Dad joked by my own daughter... I'm raising her well.

Driving into our neighborhood, windows open, start smelling skunk.

Me: Ugh, why is there skunk smell so far into the city?

Her: Maybe someone was keeping one as a pet, and it... Backfired!

Me: proud groan

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👤︎ u/TapThatSAS
📅︎ Jun 04 2014
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A man tried to keep two crows illegally as pets!

He was arrested for attempted murder.

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👤︎ u/fatandsalt
📅︎ Aug 08 2018
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