A list of puns related to "Jordan River"
Hello Fathers, is water from the Jordan River, since it is the site of Jesus' baptism, considered holy water the same way as water that had been exorcised by a priest?
There's a one-winged angel
With his sword in the sky
Flying with the syrian shooting stars.
I watch him all night,
Saber close to my thigh,
I let the centipede slither up my spine.
Lying down in a hole in the ground
But the blood of the land keeps me awake.
Crying martyrs never sleep,
Crush the serpent's skull and watch it bleed,
His scarlet scales cling beneath my feet.
Should I take the good with the bad,
His love and His wrath,
Or runaway to escape His reign?
Two beasts fighting at the edge of the world
I sit back and laugh though I don't know where I am
I just pray I don't reside in Jericho's hand.
Returning and Reporting Our Labors of the 2,137,802nd Day
12/08/2001 - by Odin Smith
π·
A true story of a trip through the Jordan River Temple
Owing to the many moronic notions which have been put in circulation by brainwashed and mindless persons, in relation to the temples of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, all of which have been designed by the authors thereof to hyperbolize its character as a Church and cover up its utter nonsense in this worldβ I have been induced to write this history, to disabuse the public mind, and put all inquirers after truth in possession of the facts, as they have transpired, in relation both to myself and the so-called sacred nature of the temples, so far as I have such facts in my possession.
In this history I shall present the various events in relation to this arrogant Church, and our unholy and most boring trek to one of its temples, in truth and honesty, as they have transpired, or as they at present exist, being now Saturday the second day since our expedition.
I arrived at the condo of Barnabus (names have been changed to protect the guilty, and this particular name was the male temple name for that day) in the time of our Lord 6:10 PM, in the town of Sandy, Salt Lake county, State of Utah . . . Phoebe (named changed to the female temple name for that day) left the city of Provo, and arrived at the condo, when I was in my fifteenth minute there, or thereabouts.
Our party therefore consisting of three souls, namely, myself (former missionary), Barnabus (former missionary), and Phoebe (she having never been to the temple, having left the Church prior to the opportunity).
Some time in the tenth minute after my arrival, there was in the condo where Barnabus lived an unusual euphoria from the wine. It commenced with me, but soon became general among . . . well, just me. Indeed, only I seemed affected by it, and three large glasses emptied themselves into my stomach, which created no small stir and contentment amongst me, crying, βIβm a little tipsy!β and, βI need another glass of wine!β Some were filled with the Merlot, some with the Pinot Noir, and some with other Frenchy sounding words.
For, notwithstanding the great euphoria which I to these different wines expressed at the time of their drinking, and the great rush manifested by their respective consumption; yet we began to commit our forgery of the most holy temple recommends, some signed by one party and some by another, it was see
... keep reading on reddit β‘https://www.sundayriver.com/jordan-8
Sunday River is replacing the currant quad on Jordan Bowl with an 8 person bubble lift. Theyβre also moving the lift from Jordan to Barker Mtn.
Has anyone here ride the entirety of the Jordan River Parkway Trail by bicycle? Itβs about 45 miles long, but Iβm wondering what the trail conditions are likeβ¦
Jordan River Parkway Trail on AllTrails https://www.alltrails.com/trail/us/utah/jordan-river-parkway-trail--2?p=-1
Does anyone know what the construction a little bit south of the wastewater treatment plant off the Jordan River Parkway is?
I lost my keyfob along the Jordan River Trail, somewhere between the Riverfront East Park and the Draper section near the Bangerter overpass. It has a Lisa Simpson keychain on it. I'll be searching the area tomorrow morning but if someone picked it up, please DM/comment. Thanks!
Edit: I just found them this morning while scouring the trail, thanks everyone!
Has anyone done this before and could give me some tips? Is it hard or would it be okay for someone (me) who has not done much kayaking before? And I'm assuming it's only possible to go one direction - so do people usually drive two cars and park one near the planned start and end location? Or is it possible to paddle up the river and get back to where you started?
Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.