A local contractor hired a pasta chef to redo the interior of a doctorโ€™s office that studies antibiotics.

The inside looks great! They have a penne ceiling.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Samwyzh
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 11 2021
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I was talking to an interior designer recently, who had just designed Adeles gaming room

She said โ€œAdele was a good person to work for, but we had problems with her computer desk. I put it on one side of the room, and Adele got pretty angry.โ€

She said Adele replied โ€œNo! I want to play Halo from the other sideโ€

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Folically-endowed
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
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What did Jesus the Interior Decorator say in his final moments?

It is furnished.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/faberj92
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 10 2020
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What do you call a pirate who does interior painting?

A swatch-buckler

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/kibsnjif935
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
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I failed shop because I couldn't handle the bow saw used to cut intricate external shapes and interior cut-outs in woodworking

I had trouble coping.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 14 2020
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The car salesman wouldnโ€™t stop trying to upsell me to the leather seats

He had interior motives

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/saucyminnow
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 30 2021
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What does a depressed interior designer say when he messed up his work?

I hate myshelf.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/FarinaIsInSpace
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jul 02 2019
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Bought a brand new Tesla Model 3 yesterday and the interior smells a little funny...

It's got kind of an Elon Musk

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SchwiftyInHere
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 25 2016
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We got an interior designer off of craigslist, we were skeptical of the outcome but he really knew how to pick the right worksurface for our kitchen

He was very counterintuitive.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/GenderStratomaster
๐Ÿ“…︎ Sep 14 2019
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Guy blew a red light and got into a pretty bad accident. A quick scan of the interior gives a pretty good idea of why he couldn't stop. (X-post from r/justrolledintotheshop)
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/HowManyMonkeys
๐Ÿ“…︎ Mar 06 2018
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Interior dec
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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/spookyAGENT
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 27 2018
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When Ancient Greeks used to mix the clay for their dwellings a rule of thumb was to mix it until it was the texture of Hummus before putting it on the interior walls

Itโ€™s quite well known that the Ancient Greeks championed Hummus Texturality

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Irv-Elephant
๐Ÿ“…︎ May 02 2019
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I phoned up my interior designer.

"The carpet by the front of my house is ruined. I'm livid," I told him.

He said, "Have you got a doormat?"

I said, "How else do you think people get in?! And my name isn't Matt."

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TommehBoi
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 23 2018
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Dusty Springfield is starting her own Interior Design/Feng Shui business.

It's called "I Just Don't Know What To Do With My Shelf"

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Cyryoonake
๐Ÿ“…︎ Dec 28 2018
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So, and Interior Decorator made me swallow paint...

I'm fine, but I think I dyed a little inside

Edit: grammar

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/SamFN
๐Ÿ“…︎ Oct 30 2018
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[Request] Wooden sign / interior design puns

I just can't seem to think of any good ones :-(. Best I got is:

Sign Waves

Sign(2Ply)

Knot on wood

Ideas?

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/Chris_Hemsworth
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 31 2018
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I asked my friend, an interior decorator, what trends are popular right now...

He said chimneys are through the roof!

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/keepwatchingtheskis
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 12 2017
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Being an interior designer must be the easiest job.

I mean, it's pretty shelf explanatory.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/TheWondermonkey
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 08 2018
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I think my girlfriend might break up with me.

Sitting on the couch watching The Bachelor with my gf (hate the show but I spend most of the time reddit-ing). She starts talking about how the guy makes out with so many different girls and goes "He even has sex with one of them when they go camping." I responded with "Wow that's fucking in-tents." So I might be sleeping on the couch tonight.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/koreanpopstarrain
๐Ÿ“…︎ Jan 13 2015
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I just sold my car and this was my add

Hi Folks, If you are a linguist then I am selling your dream car! Iโ€™m selling an Accent, a 2004 Hyundai Accent to be precise. Even if you donโ€™t know a bunch of languages, this car is still great for you.

Just like me, itโ€™s been around the birthday block a few times, but thereโ€™s still lots of life left in both of us, I guarantee! If you are looking for the perfect body, seek out a surgeon. If youโ€™re looking for a car that will love you just the way you are, this is it. Now I know what youโ€™re thinking, โ€œI bet this is a junkerโ€, but youโ€™d be wrong. Next to my wife this is the best body Iโ€™ve ever had my hands on.

Whatโ€™s wrong with it mechanically you ask? Nothing! It drives great, A/C & heat still work like a dream, breaks work, transmission shifts good, and the 1.6L engine runs great. With its age, the engine has had some parts replaced. All the belts have recently been changed, that happens with age as I just went up a few sizes myself. The washer fluid pump has been changed because itโ€™s important to be able to have a good cry once in a while. I did an oil change in the summer and depending on how long it takes for this car to finds itโ€™s new match, I will do another in the next month or so.

Since beauty is in the eye of the beholder, Iโ€™ll give you a run down of what the interior is like. Itโ€™s whatโ€™s on the inside that matters anyway right? I am the 3rd owner of this car and the previous owner was a smoker. I donโ€™t believe there is a cigarette smell anymore but the cloth seats do have little holes in them. I mean hey, when you play with fire you get burnt right? The stereo head unit has been replaced with a modern Pioneer as the original just wasnโ€™t in tune with my musical needs as a Dj. The only real problem this pretty young thing has is the passenger rear seatbelt does not retract. Since I have two mini controllers I taxi around, Iโ€™ve had car seats in the back and have had no reason to replace the seatbelt yet. A new one is only a cool $250 from Hyundai but will take some time for delivery. There are still 4 working seatbelts in the car so if youโ€™re traveling with another couple, Iโ€™m sure theyโ€™ll love to cuddle up in the middle and behind you, the driver.

The trunk is spacious enough for the average trunk but just doesnโ€™t work out so well for hauling Dj gear. The rear seats fold as easy a poker player having their bluff called, so it will give you extra room. Not much more that I can think of to tell you about but take a look at the plethora of p

... keep reading on reddit โžก

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/DjBWren
๐Ÿ“…︎ Nov 14 2017
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When my dad accepted my boyfriend.

My dad used a piece of wood to stop our dog from going in the living room. He called it the "terrier barrier." Several years later, my boyfriend is over having dinner with us. Suddenly the dog jumps over the "terrier barrier"! Instantly my boyfriend says, "looks like it's an "Interior Terrier Barrier." We all lost it.

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๐Ÿ‘ค︎ u/purpleeliz
๐Ÿ“…︎ Feb 14 2014
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