There was this news reporter who enjoyed incorporating puns into their reports. One day, they had to cover the story of a mass stabbing. Unfortunately, the reporter couldn't think of a pun so they just sighed and went on to report the news how it was...

"Sorry, no pun n' ten dead"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fluffy627
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25 2020
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Ron worked at Chihuahua Nation Incorporated.

One day, a blind customer came in with his chihuahua and demanded a return. β€œWhat’s wrong with your CNI dog, sir?” Ron asked. He yelled, β€œThis isn’t what I meant!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/morsodo99
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2020
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Ghosts aren’t real: when you die you’re not incorporeal...

... but in corpse for real.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/theknightwho
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
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What do you call incorporeal undead on eastern pacific islands?

Galapaghosts

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MediatorZerax
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2015
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My husband is now having our dog dad-joke me

Me, to dog: "It's cold out, I don't want to walk you, just go do your business in the yard."

Husband (providing dog's voice): "I'm not incorporated."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Vampilton
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
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My black father had a race and a sex change procedure.

Now she's TRANSPARENT!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/drexvil
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2019
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Help needed for a colour pun

I'm currently developing a game for my studies based on the old windows Game Pipe Dream (or Pipe Mania). It is two player and competitive where each player works for one of two rival companies. The game has a steampunk theme and each company is represented by a different colour. Green is Greenpunk Industries. I need your help, pun masters of reddit, in coming up with a pun for the Blue company.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TimeTraveller264
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2014
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My personal favourite of my dads.

Everytime we drive up north for the Holidays we pass by the same shop to get something to eat.

>Dad: "Oi buz, you want a piecost?"

>Me: "What's a piecost?"

>Dad: "About $4.50"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/notDarksta
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07 2014
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Two men were having a contest..

The Englishman and Cowboy were tied in a contest of who was better, when the crowd decided that, as a tie breaker, they were to perform a live poem and incorporate the words "Hunting" and "Timbuktu."

The Englishman went first:

"The hunting is always grand, When in search of good land. Off in the caravan we pursue, Looking, for Timbuktu."

The crowd went wild, knowing that the cowboy couldn't win the contest, the Englishmans poem was just too good. He smiled as well, and stood aside for the cowboy.

The cowboy paused for a moment as if remembering something, then recited:

"Well it was Tim and I, off huntin we went, When I spied three women in a tent. I motioned to Tim, and he saw them too, Then I bucked one, and Timbuktu."

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 29 2018
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[request] Boat puns?

Decorating a cardboard boat tomorrow (made it today) and thinking of covering it with different puns. The name shall be Admiralable Saboateur if I go this route, but I'm not sure how to incorporate it all together to make it a theme. I also thought of Aquadisiac and "Are you my armama?" but I'm not sure if the crowd would get the armada reference either. Any boat puns are appreciated!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LivingSecrets
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2017
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[Request] Pun for the name "Gloria"?

I'm usually good with name puns , but I can't think of a funny way to incorporate it. Some words to help - Glory, Glorious, Galore, Glow, , euphoria...

Edit/update: I used Glorias as in glorious. "I hope you had a Glorias day"

She said, "lmao, your silly".

I think that's a win....?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/EDM117
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02 2017
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Need help with a pun, please

Hey guys. I need help with a pun, I've been thinking about it for a while and haven't come up with it. In Portuguese you informally say "xau" when you're saying goodbye to someone (sound's almost as the Italian "ciao"). I have a friend who always makes this funny pun when we're going our separate ways, he always says "Xau-sescu" (CeauΘ™escu - as in the Romanian dictator) and for a few months I've been looking for a nice comeback to that pun. I was looking for a way to incorporate the name of a dictator and the word "goodbye" (in any language possible), but so far I haven't been able to. Could you guys help me out? In my native language, Portuguese, I haven't come up with anything cool (my knowleadge in dictator's names is also not very vast).

Thanks!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pauloliveira94
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2017
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