Hyperbolize Puns

She says it came from her great, great, great, great, great-grandfather.

It's the absolute worst.

Actually, it might be second-guessing.

It only took a million years.

but I think he was just being hyperbolic

I had to explain to him that I was married now and that's where I sleep.

I just looked at her and said "well that's odd."

Hyperbola.

The Hyperbole

...and send them to the Hyperbole.

I can say, without hyperbole, that the jokes here determine the difference between a boy and a groan, man.

Me: [one of my teachers] basically never gives us any homework.

Dad: I doubt that. I think you've had homework from him before.

Me: Hyperbole.

Dad: My name isn't Perbole, it's Dad!

Ugh...

I recently subscribed to this sub and it's my new favorite. I shamelessly stole the "tan line" joke for Facebook and a nerd volley with another dad ensued quickly.

Me: Wow, this warmer weather is getting me ready for spring. Hey, I'm already getting ready for summer, check out my tan line! <graph of tangent>

Him: It's certainly not a farmer's tan line...not straight enough.

Me: No farmer's life for me. It's not something I'd sine up for.

Him: ...and I wouldn't cosine your startup loan. (groan)

Me: Sheesh, there's no reason to be hyperbolic.

Him: I really must learn how to integrate all your math vocabulary into my daily life.

Me: You'd really have to think of some way to differentiate yours from mine.

Him: heh...maybe after I move to the delta and crawl under a natural log. I'm sorry, it just struck me that I'm acting the total asymptote.

Me: Ugh. The average of the posts in this thread is degenerating.

Him: We've traversed a slippery slope and while I don't mean to be mean we've gone way past the apex of this thread.

My wife: Nerds.

Me: You married me.

My dad is convinced that he coined the term "SQTM" online, meaning "smiling quietly to myself," in lieu of the often-hyperbolized "LOL." And tries to implement it frequently.