I really like that actress in β€œHouse of Cards,” β€œManhattan” and β€œThe Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.”

I’m a Rachel Brosnafan.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/backalleywillie
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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What are the walls on a house of cards made of?

Cardboard.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DumelDuma
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2019
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I'd just finished building a beautiful house of cards when my wife walked in and destroyed it

It was a massive blow

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πŸ‘€︎ u/soody765
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
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When I first heard someone talking about House of Cards, I thought, "God damn it. Not another one." imgur.com/wDQAOIm
πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2013
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House of Cards

I think it was unintentional but the dialogue went:

Frank: Are you coming to the memorial today?

Claire: Do I have to?

Frank: No.

Claire: I'm buried right now.

Frank: Fine.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bajida
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2015
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New TV Show Puns

I put up Punderdome cards on my door every day. Today's cards were too much fun not to share. What else can you come up with?

https://preview.redd.it/fru7gc2epjo21.jpg?width=2160&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=370a3ac0776b86863ed4ec133f9b667ec190566f

Project Run-a-way

America's Next Top Money Launderer

Keeping Up with the Car-Jackings

Naked & Public Exposure

My Solitary Confinement Life

The Real House-arrest Wives

The Great British Breaking & Entering

So You Think You Can Drink & Drive?

America's Got Theft

Pawn(ing Stolen Goods) Stars

Jersey Shore You Should Steal That Car

Who Wants to be an Arrested Felon?

Say Yes to the Drugs

Arson Daily

What else do can you think of?!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Leash15
πŸ“…︎ Mar 26 2019
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I used to know a cat burglar named Carl.

Carl had this calling card of his. When he was nearly done burgling a house, he would put a brick inside the victim's washing machine, and switch it on. The washing machine would destroy itself, and the owners would know that the perpetrator could only be Carl.

Carl's number eventually came up, when he burgled a house with three savage guard dogs. They put an end to his burglary career.

I guess you could say, washing machines live longer with Carl gone.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShredderSte
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
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Wedding Puns

The funniest and cutest wedding puns by Puns Ville

It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers.


Let’s talk about rights and lefts. You’re right so I left


Marriage is: Finding the one person to ANNOY for the rest of your life!


To some, marriage is a word. To others, a sentence.


When they bought a water bed, the couple started to drift apart.


Honeymoon: The holiday a man takes before he begins to work for a new boss.


When the TV repairman got married, the reception was excellent.


An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.


When a woman steals your husband, there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.


What do you call a melon that’s not allowed to get married? Cantelope.


Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe


To many girls think the word β€˜marriage’ has a nice ring to it.


Marriage is like a bar of soap. It smells delicious until you take a bite out of it!


Two nuclear technicians got married. She was radiant and he was glowing.


Two florists got married. It was an arranged marriage.


Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is finished.


Two pianists had a good marriage. They always were in a chord.


When a psychic showed me the girl I’ll marry, it was love at second sight.


The trouble with being the best man at a wedding is that you never get to prove it.


At the cocktail party, one woman said to another, β€˜Aren’t you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?’ The other replied, β€˜Yes, I am, I married the wrong man.’


After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, β€˜You know, I was a fool when I married you.’ The husband replied, β€˜Yes, dear, but I was in love and didn’t notice.’


Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.


A man inserted an β€˜ad’ in the classifieds: β€˜Wife wanted’.Β  Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: β€˜You can have mine.’


When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.


What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?Β About 30 pounds.


Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.Β  Second marriage is

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Punsville
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2017
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So I got a text from my dad about Valentine's day...

Dad: Do you have a date for Valentine's day?

Me: Yeah, House of Cards and a long car ride.

Dad: Well, I do

Me: Ummmm, okayy?

Dad: Yeah, it's February 14. I thought everyone knew that.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GetToTheKarma
πŸ“…︎ Feb 14 2014
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