Front Man Puns

You keeled my father. Prepare two die.

*I sent this to my brother and he replies: Was his name Inyougo?

^(What a freaking professional)

a man who runs behind a car gets exhausted.

It wasn't his cup of tea.

He took a sip of the drink, his wife took a sip and then set the cup down between them.

As he began to eat his few bites of hamburger, the people around them were looking over and whispering.

Obviously, they were thinking, "That poor old couple...all they can afford is one meal for the two of them."

As the man began to eat his fries, a young man came to the table and politely offered to buy another meal for the old couple.

The old man said, they were just fine, they were used to sharing everything.

People closer to the table noticed the little old lady hadn't eaten a bite.

She sat there watching her husband eat and occasionally taking turns sipping the drink.

Again, the young man came over and begged them to let him buy another meal for them.

This time the old woman said, "No, thank you, we are used to sharing everything."

Finally, as the old man finished and was wiping his face neatly with the napkin, the young man again came over to the little old lady who had yet to eat a single bite of food and asked, "What is it you are waiting for?"

She answered, "THE TEETH!"

He was advised to have light meals only.

I was checking out a chequered Czech check-out chick who was checking out some chicken at the checkout.

Yard Art is strictly prohibited.

He said "Because, honey. Aloe view."

Matt

He was my Father’s Son with the Holy Post.

A pretty stand-up guy.

Egg Grohl

...he replied "No, just taking a shit."

and then he entered the house!!

(it's ok if you don't laugh- it's a bit of an inside joke.)

A man who runs behind gets exhausted.

Matt

-He was tired What happened to the man running behind the car? -He was exhausted

They both need sleep...the man in front of the car gets tired and the man behind the car gets exhausted.

Matt.