My Dad has always been a Fabrication head at a lift company and my mum is a retired nurse..
According to him, their first date was "A Casual tea"..
I strongly considered joining the muslin faith until I realized the entire thing was a fabrication.
My dad worked in sheet metal for many years. Now I work in a metal fabrication shop.
Guess you could say I come from a pretty weld to do family
What is Mario's favorite type of fabric?
What was the most popular fabric of 2020?
So I used to have an interest in coloring fabrics, but I decided to make puns instead.
Basically, if I couldn't make puns, I'd dye.
Please vote here: When a prince ties fabric around his neck, is it a scarf, cravat or an ascot?
Voting has ended. It's a tie.
(Warning: Morbid dad joke) True Story -- My family were planning my mum's funeral. We always try to keep things light and try to stay positive, just as Mum would have it...
The funeral director was asking us what we think Mum should wear in her casket.
Mum always loved to wear sarongs (fabric wraps that go around the torso and drape downward a bit like a long skirt would), so my uncle suggested that she wear a sarong in there.
The funeral director looked a bit confused, as did some of our family members, to which my uncle added:
"What's sarong with that?"
I started laughing like an idiot. He was proud of it too. The funeral director was rather shocked. We assured her, and our more proper relatives, that Mum would've absolutely loved the joke (which is very true).
His delivery was perfect. I'll never forget the risk he took. We sometimes recall the moment as a way help cushion the blows of the grieving process.
My wife has been online this week, buying lots of black and white fabric.
I do hope she doesn’t make a habit of it
My friend is inventing breakthrough upholstery fabric that can self-mend rips and tears. When I asked how he's progressing, he replied....
“Dad, why do you always wrap my birthday gifts in this weird fabric?”
Dad: I just wanted to.... make my presents felt.
I want to tell a joke about fabric...
What do you call evil fabric? Satin
What type of fabric softener does iron man use ?
Are underpants with a 3.14 mm wide crotch fabric called
I lost a court case against a fabric softener
I fought Lenor and Lenor won!
8 y/o, "Dad, what does the space needle sew?"
Me, "I dunno, what?"
Her, "The fabric of space time!"
She told me that while we were watching the new years show at the space needle lol.
A monastery decided to liven up their old clothes by tie-dying them, but the fabric became stiff and uncomfortable. When the Abbott asked a sister to explain, she gave a simple reply:
Have you heard the joke about the gold metalic woven fabric?
I got a build a bear with too little fabric and tried to build it.
I just have a preference for certain fabrics.
Nothing you say will dissuede me!
Why wasn't the fabric softener doing so great?
It was feeling rather Downy.
Man shot 200 times with upholstery gun.
Surgeons revealed he is now 'fully recovered'.
Wife: “should we get the hypoallergenic fabric softener?”
Me: “no the regular stuff is fine we’re only a littleallergenic”
I'm like the fabric version of King Midas.
Everything I touch becomes felt.
Wanna know why I started trying out fabric arts and crafts?
Fabric shops are materialistic.
Used a fabric softener bottle to spread rock salt on the driveway, had to label it properly
Why did the comedian go to JoAnn Fabrics?
He wanted to get some new material.
What do you call a helicopter made of old fabric?
What kind of fabric makes you procrastinate?
Did you hear about the new fabric that can send text messages?
Is that felt? *Obviously cotton fabric*
Son responds, "No."
*Touches said fabric* - "It is now!"
What do you call a psychic fabric?
What's the most emotional fabric?
What Beatle is entirely made out of fabric?
I dropped my wife's epilepsy medicine in the washing machine instead of fabric softener....
Now her clothes don't fit.
What happens to the fabric when it reaches consciousness?
What's Jaw's favorite fabric?
Denim.....denim...denim..denim.denim
I'm like the fabric version of King Midas
Everything I touch becomes felt
I'm like the fabric version of King Midas
Everything I touch becomes felt
“Dad, why did you wrap my birthday gift with this weird fabric?”
“I wanted my presents felt.”
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