Here’s a Spanish joke: Did you hear that Mexicans created a machine that dispenses fish?

They call it a pez dispenser

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GDGameplayer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 25 2020
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I put the last roll of toilet paper on the dispenser today.

Shits just got real.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RobMV03
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 13 2020
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For the life of me, I could not get the sweet tea dispenser to work during my lunch.

I was having some difficultea.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sir_Gnome
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 17 2020
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What do you call a blockage in an ice dispenser?

An obstruction of justice.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/NairodI
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 14 2019
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I found a cutlery dispenser that doesn’t work properly

No forks were given

πŸ‘οΈŽ 49
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/TannedCroissant
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 27 2018
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Did you hear about the machine powered using marbles that dispenses cinnamon while playing a short song?

They call it the "Marble Cinna-matic Uni-verse"

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/BunzarTheFuzzy
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 04 2019
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What do you call a water dispenser that only fills the glass half full?

An optimist prime

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/3HeadedBitch
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 11 2019
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They just reloaded the coin change machine, but it won’t dispense coins..

It doesn’t make any cents.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/drumad_
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 19 2018
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I couldn't figure out how to use the soap dispenser

Then it dawned on me.

Got my girlfriend with this one at her family gathering.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/postfontaine67
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 06 2016
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Someone drew this and stuck it on a napkin dispenser in the campus pub
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ElderCunningham
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 19 2014
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Me every time I walk up to someone's fridge to get ice from the dispenser, I purposely set it to water and yell....

...."I think your refrigerator is broken. This ice is coming out melted!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DudeWheresMyEmpanada
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 29 2016
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More U.S. Presidents were born in Virginia than any other state.

I guess you could say it's a Prez dispenser.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/RonPalancik
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 12 2019
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Drink machine at a gas station imgur.com/a/aeCjgcu
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/MachoManShark
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 13 2018
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The first time I genuinely laughed at a customer’s joke

The new Aquaman Pez dispenser looks like Jesus. A man was checking out, picked it up and said. Man: is this a Jesus Pez dispenser Me: no that’s Aquaman Man: Oh wow I guess all fish no loaves huh

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bigdickbiggerheart
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 11 2019
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Little brother dadjoked me in Target

LB: Why are the soda dispensers out of order?

Me: Something is broken and it hasn't been fixed yet.

LB: But they can just reorganize it!

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pompous512
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 15 2014
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I was out for lunch with my girlfriend today…

And we found ourselves more interested in the napkin dispenser than we probably should have. It occurred to us that there was an industry in these dispensers, and we should join it and crush the competition.

I quipped, "Yes. We need to make our own napkin empire, and beat the Ottoman Empire."

She said that joke could and should become famous.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/jelvinjs7
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 01 2015
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Dad joking dad's at the local gas station.

Dad's: "I'll have Marlboro reds in a box."

I begin to scan the cigarette dispensers with a concerned face. Moving my hands across the different packs I say,

"Sure you don't want them in a jar? Or how about Tupperware?"

If it makes dad's groan, I'll probably make a great grandfather.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/crispyjay
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 17 2014
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My GF's grandfather is the master of Dad Jokes

The other day I am hanging at my GF's Grandparent's home when all of a sudden her grandpa takes a bunch of tape from their tape dispenser and just puts it on to his ear. Obviously very confused my GF goes "Grandpa what are you doing?" to which he responds "Oh, just listening to my tape"

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ssccoottaa
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 29 2013
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Got a few of my fellow employees

Well I wait tables in a local restaurant, while opening one morning the the un-sweet tea dispenser was not working. The dishwasher was able to fix it and brought it back out to the drink station. I then thanked him by saying "Unsweet, thanks!" The entire back of house face palmed.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DamnProudpsk
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 25 2014
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