A doctor was teaching a class, and wanted to give a pop quiz about tolerance and observance when dealing with the cadavers. (L) (On Mobile)

Teacher: โ€œSo I want everyone to understand that a dead body isnโ€™t disgusting, and we need to be able to handle it and always be observant at all times when dealing with oneโ€

The teacher has everyone turn their body over

Teacher: โ€œNow I want you all to stick your finger in itโ€™s ass and hold it in there for a momentโ€

all of the students do as instructed, hesitant at first

Teacher: โ€œOkay, now go ahead and pull your finger out and then put a finger in your mouth like I doโ€

The students getting a little disgusted by that request REALLY hesitated at first, but eventually they all did as he asked

As the teacher has all of his students with their finger in their mouth, he tells the class, โ€œnow see itโ€™s not disgusting if you did it right...if you put your index finger in the ass, and put your middle finger in your mouth like I did, you have just passed my classโ€.

With minimal observance, and a dead silent room...not one student passed the pop quiz

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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/wonkagloop
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 13 2021
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My mother called the cops on me because she heard I was dealing coke in the neighborhood

I tried to tell her multiple times that I was working for Pepsi, but she just wouldn't listen.

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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/OmegaLiquidX
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 18 2020
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So Poland's dealing with a surge in the number of the novel coronavirus cases. Can we say that the Winged HusSARS arrived?
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Niggociable
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 28 2020
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My boss told me to wear rubber gloves while dealing with customers this week. I told him โ€œFuck that.โ€

Iโ€™m doing these prostate exams my way.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 328
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/WitnessChemical
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 20 2020
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What happened to the crack-dealing demon?

Arrested for possession.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 21
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/CheesusHChrust
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 06 2020
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It's been a lifelong dream of mine to live in a house with my own clone. But the science has just come out that most people would hate dealing with someone identical to them.

I just don't think I can live with myself after hearing that.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 13
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/MrFillywonk
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 18 2020
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Dadโ€™s are not the only one dealing with dad bods during the pandemic

Their sisters are also getting auntie bodies

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/PLUMBUM2
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 21 2020
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Why does an ovum-dealing hymentoptera make things faster?

Because it's an egg-seller ant

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/_ze_
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 24 2020
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Does anyone know what happened to that guy who got arrested for dealing oregano?

Last I heard, he was doing thyme.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 14
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/cowimpersonator
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 31 2020
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Dealing with ED

Isn't that hard

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/hotsprings1234
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 05 2020
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I danced around dealing with my obsession for years...
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 984
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ducksarewitches
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 23 2017
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Props to the school janitor for always dealing with your crap
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ItsEmeraldd
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 13 2019
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Dealing with son's sexuality issues..

Son: Okay, so I would identify as bisexual.

Me: And that means you would have a male partner.

Son. Yep.

Me: Or a female partner.

Son: Yep.

Me: And that means you're bi.

Son: Yep.

Me: So that means if you don't find a partner you're on standbi?

Son: ..

Son: ...

Son: ..

Son: Did you just..

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 568
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ralphfaith
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 11 2017
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What do you call a drug dealing vampire?

Count Crackula

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ChiZou11
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 27 2019
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I really hate dealing with slimey stuff.

That shit always gets out of hand.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Extra_Rias
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 09 2019
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A patient bursts into a doctorโ€™s office, "Doctor, I believe I'm a deck of cards!" The doctor calmly replies, "Go sit in the waiting room, please, I'll be dealing with you later." short-funny.com/best-punsโ€ฆ
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/moses10960
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 10 2017
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I work for the NHS dealing with moving patients between different areas of the hospital.

It's a re-warding job.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 36
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/keithasaurus
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 04 2019
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Most people get into dealing drugs for the money

I do it for the percs

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/irlingStarcher
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 30 2018
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Four hundred years ago, the pagan minority in Salem learned a valuable lesson about dealing with religious fanaticism

Be careful what you witch for

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 16
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/The_Possum
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 09 2018
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I wrote my strategy for dealing with a specific set of circumstances in a notebook, but my friend wrapped it in aluminium paper.

He foiled my plan.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/AlRedux
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 03 2019
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Drug dealings in the avian world. reddit.com/r/birdswitharmโ€ฆ
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Biz_Ascot_Junco
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 11 2018
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I asked my friend, โ€œHow are you dealing with your dog with no legs?โ€

He said, โ€œItโ€™s no walk in the park.โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 06 2018
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As a customer, you know you're dealing with a cashier who is really nice when she asks, "You know that's diet, right?"

As said cashier, you know you're dealing with a potential dad when he responds "No, miss, this is Diet Coke."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/aRatherDapperFox
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 29 2018
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Dealing with some shit

I live on a sail boat and started what I thought would be a small project. I wanted to ensure that my toilet plumbing was working correctly before having a guest over so I turned on my macerator and began pumping clear water through the system to clean the toilet and clear the system completely. For those that donโ€™t know, a macerator is basically a garbage disposal like you would have in your kitchen sink buttttt for your poop. It cuts up your poop and toilet paper so that it can be discarded over board in smaller pieces. Of course the pump wasnโ€™t working correctly so I detached some plumbing, looked into the macerator motor and got way more into it than I had planned for. My guest was on her way and I didnโ€™t want to necessarily tell her what I was dealing with because I didnโ€™t want to gross her out. When she showed up I was just putting stuff away and had finished the project. Of course she asked what I was working on, I proclaim โ€œ oh I just needed to deal with some shitโ€ and left it at that.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/lzrdkng421
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 31 2018
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Dealing with the arctic bomb cyclone (xpost /r/wholesomememes)
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Poppamunz
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 06 2018
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It's a shame Aziz Ansari is dealing with a scandal from a first date

He should have known it was not the right Tom to Have her for dessert.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/chileconqueso
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 15 2018
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I've been dealing with confidence issues, so I bought a sauna.

It's so I can give my self a steam.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/mkaic
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 18 2018
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I read a bunch of news articles dealing with lightning strikes recently.

I am trying to keep myself knowlegeable in current events.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Calthropstu
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 12 2017
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While watching the elections i realized Trump was winning alot of states were Red. Guess you can say america was dealing with another.. Red Scare..
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Ryuzaki650
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 09 2016
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Boyfriend's clever dad-joke strategy for dealing with my complaining.

After spending an hour cleaning a filthy fridge for the second time in three weeks, I was irritable and complaining loudly about all the nasty leftovers left in there. My boyfriend, trying to be cute, opens up a jar of pickled okra and puts one into my mouth mid-sentence...

Him: "Here have some."

Me: Sigh "Okay..."

Him: It's hard to argue with pickled okra...

...because it doesn't talk."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/navkat
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 07 2014
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Dealing with heartburn after dinner

http://i.imgur.com/XIsfNDj.jpg

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
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๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/deutschbag17
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 17 2015
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