Comeback Kid Puns

I have a 6 year-old and a 8 year-old.

Whenever my kids ask me, "Dad, can I ask you a question?" I reply, "You just did." And then smile.

Also, whenever my kids say, "Dad, guess what?" I comeback with something completely ludicrous, "Uh, you just saw an polka-dotted elephant in the kitchen and he stole your lunch?"

They do not find it humorous at all. But, I crack myself up.

My boss likes to bust one of my coworker's balls. It's all in good fun and it usually results in a witty comeback.

Boss: I'll have to pick up some diapers for the grand kid after work. Hey Kevin, do you want me to grab you some?

Kevin: Depends.